Amber Dreams
by Satashi
Summary: When given time off, Fate visits Nanoha and Vivio for a few days. Although she ended her relationship with Nanoha some time ago, Fate realizes that she can't run from her past forever. Now she must come to terms with herself and the love for her family.
1. Chapter 1

Dedicated to all the scanlators in the Nanoha fandom: the people who are doing Vivid, Force, and the random doujinshi. Also, I tried to take my time with this one so I hope it shows in my writing (especially because my last few stories have been written in a more lazy way). If you like it please be sure to let me know! Special thanks to DezoPenguin for giving me some advice, and Mercurianangel for beta reading.

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A late night movie filled the otherwise quiet living room with sounds of drama and action, although the movie itself was mostly ignored by me. In fact, I was sleepier now than when I had originally started watching the show while Nanoha washed tonight's dishes. With my red eyes half open, I shifted under the blanket lazily and gave up trying to get my nightgown to stay in its proper place. I watched Nanoha as the girl passed in front of me and found it more interesting than the program currently airing. Nanoha bent over to pick up Vivio's mess of binders and notebooks, unconsciously wiggling her butt in front of my face. Seconds went by before I finally reached forward and poked my friend's cheek, getting a small shriek.

**Amber Dreams**

**By:**

**Satashi**

When Nanoha looked behind herself, she could only smile at Fate's playful innocent face. A pillow was picked up and placed on the blonde's head and small giggling came as Nanoha poked her friend's stomach through the blankets a few times until she curled up in a ball so the attack could no longer reach the tickle points. Now unable to keep her advantage, Nanoha went back to picking up Vivio's mess and stacking the books neatly on the corner of the table to line them all back up before standing. "I'm going to give these back to Vivio and remind her to always pick up after herself."

"Okay," Fate replied back, staying in her position with one eye peeking out from the impromptu fort of blanket and couch pillows. When no other attack seemed to be coming, she shifted to re-arrange her clothing.

Walking into the small hallway of her house, the woman made her way to Vivio's room. Her hand reached to knock on the door of her daughter but stopped before she rapped her knuckles on the wood. Silence greeted her hesitation and her ear was leaned forward to listen, hearing soft snores. She gave the door a confused look and went back to the living room to see Fate now sitting upright with the blanket wrapped around her upper body. "I don't keep it _that_ cold in here."

"It's freezing," Fate replied back simply. Her eyes watched Nanoha place the books down on the table and tilted her head curiously to the side. "Decide not to tell Vivio?"

"She's asleep." Nanoha spoke lightly as she adjusted the thermostat to knock it up two degrees to please her guest. "She's normally always trying to stay up past her bedtime."

Fate pondered the information. "Maybe she tired herself out; she has tests coming up right?" She got a nod and smiled when Nanoha sat down next to her. "I wish I wasn't away so much, maybe I could help her..."

"She's smarter than anyone I know," Nanoha replied back soothingly. "But I wouldn't mind it if you were home more. It gets a little lonely when Vivio stays the night with her friends on the weekends."

The blonde felt the familiar pain in her chest when the words came paired with Nanoha scooting closer to her. "Nanoha..."

"It's okay." Words were whispered softly as she hugged her friend, placing her cheek against Fate's chest. "I know you're busy with your work... But you're always missed here at home."

Fate leaned back on the couch and held her friend, eyes looking over the house that she barely knew. Even though she sent part of her pay to Nanoha and Vivio to help with rent and bills, she had barely spent a month in the house that her friend had declared their home over the course of almost half a year. "I know..." Fate spoke into Nanoha's hair. "I know, sweetheart."

The brunette gave a bittersweet smile at the ever so rare pet name from Fate. The feeling in her heart came again and she pulled the woman closer. "You're only here until tomorrow... Let's stay up late okay?"

"Nanoha..." Fate felt herself being pushed back onto the couch slowly. "We can't..."

"Shhh...."

"It's... wrong..."

"No it's not..."

"But..." Fate closed her eyes and felt her will waver when the lips came at her neck to kiss. "We both decided... that we...."

"I never said it." Nanoha told her, hugging her friend closer. "My feelings haven't changed, Fate-chan. I told you I would wait for you to make up your mind on your job... but... you're here now... with me... so it's okay."

The kissing came again, now working her way up to Fate's lips. The blonde's will gave at once, arms moving up to wrap around Nanoha. '_It will only make it hurt worse when I have to leave..._' Another kiss came and she felt Nanoha shifting clumsily, standing so she could start carrying her. '_We both said we shouldn't get in a relationship... it would only-_' her rational thinking left when she felt the soft mattress under her body and warmth lay on top of her. Smooth hands touched her sides and gentle lips were touched against hers. '_It will hurt so badly tomorrow..._' Their fingertips interlaced and both girls looked into each other's eyes for a few moments. '_We shouldn't...But I love her so much..._'

~**~

Red eyes slowly opened, hazily looking across the bed in a sleepy glaze. Fate closed her eyes again for a few more moments before opening them again, this time more focused. Brown hair was noticed just under her line of sight at the same time as a body shifted against her. Soft breathing was against her neck and she recalled the previous night without any trouble. '_Nanoha…_' Moving back just slightly, Fate looked down at her friend and saw the girl sleeping peacefully against her. A long sigh came from her lips and she hugged Nanoha once more, eyes closed tightly. A light mumble came against her chest and the blonde reluctantly moved away, kissing Nanoha's forehead lovingly. "I need to go," She whispered softly so she wouldn't wake her lover. Her heart ached so much that she had to place a closed hand over her chest in an attempt to steady herself after moving away from the warmth. '_We can't do this…_' Her mind told herself repeatedly as she opened her suitcase to find her uniform to change into. '_I can't… I can't handle this…_' a tear was wiped from her eye and a soft sniff was repressed in an attempt to stay quiet. '_It gets harder and harder every time... Nanoha…_'

After looking at her naked lover in bed for a long moment, Fate finally went over to her and pulled the covers up to the girl's shoulders. '_I'm going, Nanoha… I don't know when I can visit again…_' She had to swallow down her sadness and wipe her eyes. '_I should write you a note so I don't have to tell you face to face again that we can't be together… that we can't keep doing this… It hurts so much already…_' Her eyes started watering again and Fate stood up completely, smiled one last time at her sleeping friend, and made her way out of the room. Silently she went into the hallway and placed her suitcase down when she heard soft sniffling coming from the bathroom. Instead of heading to Vivio's bedroom she went to the cracked door and tapped on it lightly? "Vivio?" She asked softly. "Are you okay?"

"Mama…" The word made Fate walk into the bathroom and over to the young girl sitting on the floor while leaning against the wall.

"What's wrong, Vivio?" Gentle hands moved the wild hair from the child's face and gave the god mother a frown. "You're burning up…"

"I don't feel good…" Vivio accepted the hug from her mother and found herself lifted to be sat onto the counter.

"You don't look good either, your eyes are all puffy…" Fate tried to smooth out Vivio's hair while placing her palms on the girl's forehead and neck. "You have a high fever… did you throw up?" She got a very weak nod. "Are you going to again?" This time Vivio shook her head so Fate nodded at her, grabbing a washcloth to dampen lightly before cleaning her godchild's face. "Here, let's get you back in bed okay?" Wrapping both arms around her daughter, she lifted her up and carried her out of the bathroom and into the hallway. The door at the end was opened and the small girl was laid into the bed carefully. "Get some rest, mama will call your school and tell them you'll be absent today. If you need anything be sure to call okay?"

"Mama…" Vivio held onto Fate's hand when it was being pulled back from her. "You're leaving aren't you?" The sad tone in her voice was obvious.

"…Yes, I could only stay for one day this time." Her heart broke when the multi colored eyes misted over once more. "I'm sorry Vivio." She leaned over and hugged her daughter. "I want to stay with you…"

"Please… Please Fate-mama…"

Fate gave the girl a small smile, her weak determination already being shaken to the breaking point when Nanoha had mumbled her name earlier that morning in her sleep. Now with her best friend's child sick in bed looking at her like she was, the woman couldn't say no. "I'll stay, Vivio." The smile came at once and heterochromic eyes easily closed now. "Get some rest. Fate-mama will be here when you wake up. I love you, sweetie." Leaning over, Fate kissed the girl's forehead and tucked her in.

"I love you too, Fate-mama."

Reluctantly, Fate moved from Vivio's bedside and went back into the hallway. After closing the door behind herself she turned around and stopped in her tracks when Nanoha stood in front of her in only a baggy shirt. "You were going to leave without telling me goodbye, weren't you?" Nanoha asked softly, voice clearly hurt.

"Nanoha…" Fate took a few steps forward and hugged the girl. To her surprise, arms went around her as well to return it. "I'm sorry."

"It's my fault…" Nanoha admitted gently. "I know… we talked about it…I promised I would wait… but…" Nanoha placed her forehead against Fate's shoulder and held onto the sides of the enforcer uniform. "I know we said we weren't together, that we weren't dating… that I should find Vivio a good father figure… but I don't want anyone else… I want _you_."

"Nanoha," Fate placed her hands on her friend's shoulders and eased her away lightly so they could look at each other. "You know how much this hurts me too. I don't… we've talked about it before."

"Let's talk about it again." Nanoha didn't give up. "I love you, Fate-chan."

Fate closed her eyes, feeling Nanoha hug her again tightly. "I'm not good for you."

"You're the best."

"I'm not _here_." Fate countered, shaking her head and pulling away. Tears were already on her cheeks, which were wiped away. "You deserve someone better, someone who can take care of you, someone who can… who can be there for Vivio."

Nanoha slowly shook her head. "Fate-chan is the only person who can look after Vivio besides me."

"Yuuno-"

"Is my friend." Nanoha cut her off. "If something happened to Vivio, you would be here no matter what. I know that."

Fate opened her mouth to reply but slowly closed it, knowing that she had already promised Vivio to stay another day just because she was sick. "Nanoha, you're breaking my heart."

"You broke mine when you left me… I just want them to heal together. Please, Fate-chan, give me another chance, I promise I'll-"

"It's not _you!_" Fate finally told her loudly, voice breaking. "You know this." Her hands went to Nanoha's shoulders again and pushed her gently to make her start walking back from Vivio's door.

"Let's talk in the bedroom."

"Living room." Fate asked desperately. A small nod was given to her and the two sat on the couch next to each other. Fate slowly leaned forward and placed her face in her hands to collect herself a moment. After almost a minute of silence the blonde finally began speaking. "Back then… while we were in section six together, it was different."

Nanoha shook her head softly. "It wasn't different, it was just easier."

"I can't see you every day… I can't hold you every night… I… I sometimes go months without ever seeing you… You don't need that."

"I know what I do and don't need." Nanoha countered her gently, scooting closer and slowly placing her hand on Fate's wrist in a silent request to hold it. The blonde moved her hand away from her face and interlaced their fingers together. "Fate-chan," the brunette went on gently. "I know it is hard for you… but you always told me growing up that this is the job you wanted to do, and that you always dreamed about a family to come home to, so why-"

"That's why." Fate interrupted her. "I have the job that I dreamed of… the job I trained so hard for… but I can't come home to you. I'm… I can't come home to anyone while I'm away… For goodness sake, Nanoha, you always call this house half mine and I don't even know where you keep the sodas!"

Silence hung over the room thickly before Nanoha broke it by slowly taking a long intake of breath. "I can move-"

"No. You can't." Fate shook her head. "There are no mobile training facilities, let alone on a warship with highly trained and experienced officials. Vivio also needs to have a steady school where she will be safe and make friends. That's why you chose this house to live in instead of staying on the base even though it would be harder on your commute and bank account. Nanoha, I just can't… You know I have baggage."

"I know, we all do." Nanoha looked down at the floor and to her feet. "I can't ask you to stay here, I know you are happy doing what you do… But I still want to be together."

"Its not like I don't _want_ it!" Fate almost sobbed on her words. "It hurts… it hurts so _bad_! I can't lose you as a friend, but every time we're together it just... we… always…"

"I'm sorry."

Fate stayed quiet a moment while replaying last night's love making. "Don't be. I didn't stop you."

"You shouldn't have to."

"I did it because I wanted to." Fate shook her head and sighed. "Nanoha, this isn't going anywhere."

"I know, but I want you to stay just a little longer… even if it is talking about this."

Fate smiled without humor. "I'm staying another day… Vivio is sick and asked me to-"

"She's sick?" Nanoha stood up at once and went to jog to the bedroom but stopped when Fate pulled on their still connected hands. "Fate-chan?"

The blonde stood up and smiled at her friend gently. "She's sleeping now, I already tucked her in. We shouldn't wake her because while she's awake she will feel bad, but while she's asleep she won't be suffering any. Is Shamal still her doctor?" She got a small nod. "Yes, I thought so…" Looking at the clock, she started shooing Nanoha back to the bedroom. "Get ready for work and be on your way, I'll take her to the office as soon as it's open." When Nanoha opened her mouth to protest, Fate placed a finger onto the girl's lips. "Don't argue with me." The two locked eyes briefly before Nanoha brought up her other hand and touched the one keeping her mouth closed. A small kiss was planted on the fingertip and she nodded curtly before silently going back into her bedroom.

The door wasn't closed and Nanoha's shirt came off lightly on the way to her closet. Standing in the early morning sun's rays coming down from the blinds, she allowed Fate's eyes to take in her nude body while she picked out her clothing for the day. '_Fate-chan, I never understand you…_' Slowly she brought up her thigh-highs and took extra time to smooth them out. '_You always try to push me away but I know you love me… The way you look at me tells me, even if your actions did not._' Her clear blue eyes glanced over to the doorway where Fate was leaning against the frame, not trying to hide the fact she was watching. '_You can act strong but when we're together, the real you comes out… You watch me, you touch me, you give me that look like you did in the past. Fate-chan, I'm willing to give my job for you but I can't because of Vivio… why… can't you love me just as much?_' The finishing touches of her uniform were completed and her boots were strapped tight over her feet. '_I can't ask you to quit, but it doesn't mean I don't want you to… I can support us… I know it._'

Nanoha stopped at the doorframe and stood in front of her ex girlfriend. "I'm off. Please take care of Vivio for me."

"Have a good day." Fate spoke gently to her. Each stayed in their spot without moving before shaking hands gently took Nanoha's and a kiss was placed onto her cheek. "I promise… I'll be here tonight. I won't leave without telling you."

"Thank you." Nanoha nodded more to herself than to her friend. "I'll be off then. I love you."

Fate visibly refrained from saying the words. "Bye-bye, Nanoha." She watched the girl nod at her and smile as if she could hear the words anyway. Turning, Nanoha picked up Raising Heart from a small pillow on a pedestal and placed the gem around her neck. With that, she looked back at Fate one more time before glancing to Vivio's door at the other end of the house and nodded before heading outside. Fate let out a long breath of air as the front door closed behind her friend and turned to look at Vivio's bedroom door.

~**~

The cool air of the hospital was inhaled reluctantly as Fate made her way through the front doors. '_I never liked the way these places smelt…_' Her enforcer uniform paired with the sleepy girl in her arms made everyone look at her while making her way to the front desk. "Hello," She greeted the person there with a smile. "I need to see Shamal please."

"I'm sorry, Dr. Shamal isn't on duty for another hour. If it isn't an emergency, could you take a seat and fill out these papers?" The intern went to get a clipboard and pen but stopped when Fate cleared her throat to get her attention again.

"My name is Fate Harlaown, could you please page her and tell her I am here?" A smile was given and Vivio was shifted in her arms when a small moan came from her. Turning to speak to the child, Fate whispered into her ear while the person at the desk did as requested. "Don't worry sweetie, Shamal will make your tummy stop hurting really soon." Another small shift was made and Fate had to hold back a sad tone in her voice. "You're getting too big to carry…" The intern caught their attention again and after a few traded words Fate set off down a long walkway to an elevator at the end. The glossy button was pressed and doors opened for her almost at once. A short ride later and Fate found herself in another hallway, this one being a lot narrower than the downstairs version. White walls were passed, broken by the evenly spaced doorways. The florescent lights reflected neatly off the clean reflective floor and the sounds of Fate's uniform issued boots clicked loudly with each step she took until she reached the room she had been heading for. Not bothering to knock, she walked into the open door and smiled at the blonde doctor sitting at her desk. "Hello, Shamal."

"Fate," Shamal didn't hold back the pleased expression in her voice and quickly got up to walk around her black steel and marble desk to hug her long time friend. "I'm so happy to see you when you're not hurt for once." She looked at the girl being carried and then to Fate's face once more. "Sick daughter?"

"Yes," Fate gently handed over Vivio and walked with Shamal to an examination table where Vivio was placed softly on. "She said she threw up this morning." Leaning over, Fate spoke gently to the little girl. "Vivio, make sure to tell Doctor Shamal everything that is wrong with you okay? You will feel better before you know it." She got a small nod and a hum in reply so she turned to watch her friend start her job. "Thank you for seeing us before your on schedule."

"Better than making people upset because I pushed them back to see you first," Shamal replied lightly as she looked at Vivio's eyes and felt of her skin. "Vivio, can I put a thermometer in your mouth?" She leaned over and plucked the device as the girl gave her answer and placed it in it's proper spot. "Make sure to keep it under your tongue." Her hands went to get a small wrap to check the girl's blood pressure. "So, Fate, you and Nanoha are together again?"

Fate blushed and shook her head slightly. "N-no, what makes you say that?"

Not deterred by the negative reply, Shamal kept inspecting Vivio while holding conversation. "Because Nanoha won't let anyone take Vivio when she's sick, not even Yuuno. She's been scolded a few times for it, but she honestly told her superior that Vivio came before her job. Good thing she is under Hayate directly, huh?" She smiled at Fate with a sideways glance. "When I saw you with her, I just knew that you patched over your differences." Shamal took the thermometer from Vivio and looked at it. "She's sick alright, seems to be the stomach bug that has been going around lately."

"Will she be okay?" Fate tried to shift the topic from herself and patted Vivio on the head for a job well done so far.

"She will be just fine in a day or two." Picking up another object, she took the girl's hand. "Vivio, this will prick your finger, can you be a big girl for me?" She got a small nod and took the small child's finger to place on a device. "Three, two, one, prick." She felt a small flitch come but still got the needed drop of blood to place on a clean hard strip of plastic. "Good girl, much better than Fate-mama."

"H-hey now…" Fate's embarrassed voice faltered, clearly remembering her younger days where she would almost cry every time she had to have that done.

The doctor began running a few magical test on the blood right at her station, speaking to Fate as if it were the simplest thing in the world. "How long will you stay here this time?"

"I should have left this morning, but I stayed to make sure Vivio is okay."

"Have you requested another day of leave yet?" Shamal pondered while running a strand of magic between her hands and through the drop of Vivio's blood.

Fate shook her head, kissing Vivio's finger when she noticed the girl looking down at it with a sad face. The motion did its own type of magic and Vivio smiled at her godmother. "I haven't called in yet," She voiced out. "I called Vivio's school already so I figured I could contact base once I was sure Vivio was okay so I could make sure to see if I needed just today or tomorrow as well."

Shamal smiled to herself, moving away from her equipment and looking over her shoulder at her friend. "What you mean is, you want to stay with your family longer and you are justifying it by telling yourself that you have to look after Vivio so you won't admit that you need Nanoha just as much as your daughter?" She watched Fate try to respond, only to close her mouth once more. "Fate, how long are you going to lie to yourself?" She crossed her arms and gave the blonde a disapproving look. "Nanoha still loves you, why not be happy and stay with her?"

"She deserves better…" Fate looked over at Vivio to show that she wasn't comfortable talking about it in front of the girl.

Taking the hint, Shamal turned and brought up a monitor. "Are you still stationed where you have been?" She got a quiet affirmative and began to type a few things onto the display. A few moments passed and a uniformed male appeared on her screen. "Hello admiral," She greeted the man. "I am Doctor Shamal for Section Six's medical unit. It is my understanding that Fate T. Harlaown is under your command?" She ignored Fate's sudden gasp and instead listened to the person speaking to her. "Yes sir, I am afraid she has come in contact with a virus here and I need to request her to stay under my sight until I am sure she won't bring an biohazard outbreak back to your ship that could potentially infect your entire crew." Her word choice made the man look rather shocked a moment before confirming his approval to her.

Once the transmission was cut off, Fate finally spoke up in her usual concerned soft tone. "Shamal, what was that about? I haven't-"

"You kissed Vivio's finger after I took a blood sample," Shamal told her easily. "That is a first class contact of potential infection. I just told him using technical terms instead of telling him you tried to soothe your daughter." She picked up a pad of paper and scribbled down onto it. "You are to remain under my care until I release you. I'll tell Nanoha for you while you go get these prescriptions filled." Tearing out the sheets, she handed them to the blonde with a smile. Fate slowly reached up and accepted them, unable to find words to express the mixed feelings she was currently having. "Vivio should be fine tomorrow if she takes her medicine. The other one is just to make sure you and Nanoha don't get it yourselves. Please make sure she takes them, she is really bad about not doing it."

Before Fate could reply, a casual knock came on the door leading into the room and both girls turned to see Signum walking into the room. Her standard uniform was torn in several places and a cut was healing along her cheek. "Testarossa," The older woman greeted the blonde fondly. "I didn't know you were here."

"…For a few days," Fate replied back softly. "Did you just get back from a mission? Are you hurt?"

"Let's have lunch?" Signum ignored the question while glancing over at Vivio on the table. Judging from the smile on Shamal's face, she assumed the girl would be just fine. "I'll bring it by in an hour or so?"

Fate nodded lightly and helped Vivio down from the bed and took her hand now that she seemed well enough to stand on her own. "Yes, please, I'd like that." She looked at Shamal again and knew her cheeks were still colored at what had just happened. "Thank you Shamal, I appreciate it." A happy wave came to her, paired with a sucker for Vivio to distract herself with. "Well then… I'll see you soon. Come on, Vivio, let's get our medicine and then go home okay?" Her godchild smiled up at her and nodded.

Signum watched the two leave and turned to Shamal when the door was closed. "Are she and Nanoha…?"

Shamal shook her head. "Fate still doesn't understand it herself, she's still blaming work." The woman shook her head lightly. "I've known them for so long, it really pains me to see Fate so hurt. She still gives Vivio little pet names to show her affection but she can't bring herself to take responsibility again. Caro and Erio really upset her when they moved off. Poor thing has been through so much, I wouldn't be surprised if she hasn't had a break down because of it." She looked over at Signum to get her opinion. "Maybe denial is what is keeping her going?"

The pink haired warrior sighed and rubbed the bridge of her nose. "Testarossa…"

~**~

Fate brought her hands up to allow her short sleeved shirt to come down over her body before she straightened it out and checked to make sure the tag on it didn't come up when she flipped out her hair. Now fully clothed again, the girl put her hands into her jeans pockets to make them straighten out. Her enforcer uniform was placed neatly on hangers and placed in Nanoha's bedroom closet, on an almost empty rack that Nanoha had proclaimed to be Fate's since the day she moved in. Her slipper clad feet went silent over the carpet as she made her way into the hallway, heading for Vivio's open door. The little one was laying on the bed on her stomach, a book in front of her. Mis-colored eyes looked up at her and a smile came paired with them. Fate gave a small wave and loving smile before moving to answer the now sounding doorbell.

"Signum, hi." Fate greeted her friend as she opened the door the rest of the way to allow her in. "Thank you for lunch."

"Not a problem." Signum nodded at her as she went inside the cool house. "Nanoha loves the air conditioner, doesn't she?"

"So does Vivio too, apparently." Fate accepted the drinks to help carry the load to the dining room table. "I asked her what she would like the thermostat set to and she requested the same as it was already on." Heaving a small sigh, the blonde set down in a chair and pouted. "I feel like I'm in a freezer."

Signum smiled at her knowingly and passed over her share of the meal. "I got you honey seared shrimp."

"Thank you, it's my favorite." Fate accepted the carton and opened it, inhaling the scent deeply. "Smells delicious."

"So," Signum stirred her contents around a bit before spearing some meat with her fork. "Shamal tells me that Vivio isn't feeling too good?"

"The medicine perked her up noticeably. Although she's not running around outside like I'm used to seeing, she's not really looking like she'll be out for more than today. Just a little stomach bug it seems."

Signum nodded in agreement. "You are a lot more level-headed when it comes to things like this than Nanoha. She normally takes the day off when Vivio is sick. I guess she's counting on you to take care of her then." Her words hit their mark and Fate slowed down her eating just enough to be noticed. "Tell me, Testarossa, how are you two doing these days?"

"...The same as before, Signum," Fate replied back softly, eyes looking at her meal. Another bite was taken to avoid having to continue her statement but her silent request was denied when her friend spoke again.

"You're still using work as an excuse to stay away, I take it." She gauged the reaction carefully, knowing that the topic had been breached and there was no turning back now. "Really now, I expected you to figure it out by now."

"Signum, please?"

"I don't want to just watch anymore, Testarossa. You were always there for me since we became friends. We worked and served together and shared many things that we would normally never tell anyone. I know you don't place your job above all else, that's too shallow for a girl like you. What I want to know is _why_." She met Fate's shy eyes when they looked up and stare fiercely into them, sending a clear signal that she wasn't to be lied to.

"I... am not a good mother figure." Fate replied back softly, voice almost not making it to its mark. "She doesn't need that."

"_You_ don't need that." Signum countered her. "Nanoha and Vivio _do_ need you. Knowing Nanoha, she isn't keeping that a secret." Another bite was taken in an attempt to give Fate time to let the words sink in. "Tell me, Testarossa."

"Why do you call me that?" Fate asked in return, looking at Signum with a little more confidence now that she had a question that had been denied before in the past.

Signum judged the words and knew that Fate was, in her own way, seeking to give herself more confidence. Having refused to answer it in the past, she closed her eyes and took a breath. "Because," The single word made Fate almost visibly flinch in shock of getting an answer. A moment of silence passed and Signum opened her eyes again, meeting Fate's fully. "There is something in your past that you have not let go of. Until you can move forward from that, this knight can't acknowledge you completely."

Fate took the words and let them slowly run through her mind, picking at them to try and find reason to them. "What?" she finally requested when she couldn't figure it out.

"I can't tell you." The woman answered simply. "You have to discover it out yourself."

Again Fate thought about it, running several instances over in her memory. Long minutes passed by in silence as they ate and thought, finally ended by the food running out and a small moving to throw away the dishes. "I'm sorry, Signum," Fate told her finally. "I don't understand."

"I hope you do soon," Signum put both her hands on Fate's shoulders. "Or you will let someone you cherish slip through your fingers before you can close your hand. I don't wish that on anyone, least of all you."

Fate swallowed. "You...know what that feels like? But... with who?"

Signum smiled at her fondly and moved to place her forehead against her friend's. "Think about what I said, Testarossa. You are lying to yourself to avoid confronting it. The longer you wait, the more you will never be able to see." With that, she moved back and gave Fate one last look before turning. "I need to be getting back to base now. How long before you leave?"

"The day after tomorrow probably, thanks to Shamal." Fate's voice was weak, confusion laced into it. As she walked with Signum to the front door, she looked up at her again and tilted her head to the side. "I'll think about it. I promise."

"Thank you." The woman smiled, waved lightly with one hand, and turned to walk down the stone path leading to the sidewalk and to her car.

~**~

"I'm home!" A weak but enthusiastic voice came along with the sounds of the front door opening. "Ugh, what a day." Nanoha's boots were taken off thankfully and house slippers were slid on just as her best friend came into site paired with Vivio. Before she could ask how they were, Fate was already there with a concerned greeting.

"Nanoha, you look exhausted, are you okay?" She allowed Nanoha to hug Vivio and fawn over her a few moments before pressing the topic. "Really, you are shaking!" She reached over when Nanoha's hands were free and took both of them into her own. "How hard was today?"

Nanoha tried to reply with an easy answer but Vivio spoke up first. "Nanoha-mama is always tired like this after work, she tries her best every day!"

"Nanoha!" Fate said the word in a scolding manor, making her friend blush and giver her usual smile. "Don't even try that. Go take a shower this instant and I don't want you out of there until at least twenty minutes are up, you hear me?"

"Fate-chan," Nanoha almost yelped when an angry finger pointed away from her and down the hallway. "...Okay, I'm going." turning to look at Vivio, she tried her best to regain some of the dignity she had just lost. "Are you feeling better, Vivio?"

"Yes mama, I'm almost completely better now!" She nodded contently. "I'm helping Fate-mama with dinner."

Fate nodded. "Twenty minutes Nanoha, then get dressed, and then come for dinner."

The brown haired woman gave Fate a gentle look and smiled, making the blonde blink. "I missed that," Nanoha told her softly before heading off to her bathroom and shower.

The two blondes left standing at the doorway looked at each other a few moments before Vivio broke out into a wide grin. "Fate-mama is amazing. Nanoha-mama never listens to anyone when they tell her that she needs to rest." She giggled happily. "Aunt Hayate gave her the weekends off to settle down but Nanoha-mama threw a fit about it for the longest time."

"Really...?" Fate mused the word while looking at the now closed bathroom door. '_Hayate makes her take two days off every week? Vivio gets both days off at her school because they're still so young, but I'm sure it's more than just Hayate wanting Nanoha to be able to spend time with her daughter..._' Reaching out, she took Vivio's hand and started walking with her into the kitchen. Once there, she picked Vivio up and sat her on the counter. "Vivio, does Nanoha-mama look that tired every single day?"

"Yes ma'am?" Vivio tilted her head to the side. "But everyone is tired after work, right? Even Uncle Yuuno looks exhausted after working."

"That's because Uncle Yuuno is an idiot who doesn't realize how long the moon's been up sometimes." Fate said the words to herself while stirring around the mashed potatoes so her daughter wouldn't catch them all. "What do you and Nanoha do on the weekends usually?"

Vivio swayed her legs that were dangling over the counter as she thought about the question. "We started a garden in the back a few weeks ago, but other than that Mama normally does paperwork or takes my friends and me out somewhere."

"I see," Fate breathed the words out as she thought. '_Sounds like Nanoha, we always did want a garden… too bad she can't cook well enough to properly use one._' The blonde moved to cut off the now beeping base of her probe thermometer and reach to open the oven to pull out their chicken. "Vivio, could you please start setting the table?" She got a hum and the girl hopped from the counter in favor of moving around the kitchen. Now left to herself, Fate placed their main course on the stove and began to fiddle with it. Contents in pots were transferred to bowls and carried to the table via Vivio while Fate went to recover Nanoha from the now silent bathroom. "Nanoha?" A soft moan replied to her so Fate knocked on the door and peeked into it, seeing Nanoha sitting up in the bathtub. "Did you fall asleep?" Her friend tried to stumble out a negative but the rubbing of eyes and unfocused speech told her that she was clearly sleeping. "Dinner is about ready, come on now." The soft words were mixed with a smile and concern at the same time, something that Nanoha didn't seem to miss. After the door was gently closed again, the blonde went back to the kitchen to carve the bird. "Vivio, you like the breast meat right?"

After a damp haired Nanoha joined them at the table, she found a fully prepared plate placed down in front of herself. A smile crept up on her lips as she cut into the dark meat of the bird. "It looks delicious." A bite was taken and the girl closed her eyes while chewing. "Fate-chan, this is amazing."

"Really juicy," Vivio added in, her eating noticeably slower than the others due to her upset stomach.

"Of course, it's chicken." Fate replied simply before sipping on a glass of milk. "Why wouldn't it be?" Her sharp eyes caught Vivio glancing sideways at Nanoha, who suddenly looked away from everyone else. "Oh."

"H-hey!" Nanoha sniffed indignantly. "At least I can bake cookies without them smoking!"

The counter made Vivio look at Fate expectantly, a childish glint of excitement in her eyes. When the blonde lost the small skirmish without much effort, the child went back to her meal, pleased at having both her parents back at the table at the same time again. "Fate-mama," She asked curiously after swallowing. "Did you make dessert too?"

"Yes I did," Fate told her happily. "Pudding, from a box. It should be ready soon." She noticed the girl smile and felt herself do the same. "Save some room for it, okay Nanoha?" She got a curious nod and the family lapsed into a moment of silence while they ate, broken only for the occasional random chatter. Once the older blonde was sure that Vivio had eaten enough to be able to take another dose of her medicine, she went into the kitchen to recover their dessert cups. Vivio's gel-cap pill was nipped at the end and the powder was sprinkled onto her pudding before being stirred up. After a moment of pondering, she smiled and took down the smaller pills that Shamal had given her to make sure she or Nanoha didn't catch the same bug that was hanging over Vivio's head as well. Once done she walked back to the dining room and placed the cup of pudding in front of her friends and sat down herself to enjoy her own.

"Thank you, Fate-chan." Nanoha ate a bite and smiled at it, pleased to be sharing a moment of dessert with her family. "Is it good, Vivio?" She got a happy nod paired with a hum, making her smile. "It's amazing how Shamal can always make her feel better so fast."

"She takes after you," Fate spoke her thoughts aloud. "Never sick for more than a day at a time." Her red eyes watched Nanoha finish her treat before taking out her medicine and gulping it down with a small sip of her drink.

"What's that?" Nanoha asked her curiously.

Fate smiled and started helping Nanoha pick up the plates once they were all finished. "Shamal gave them to me to make sure we didn't get sick as well."

The brown haired girl hummed while following Fate to the kitchen. "You're not going to force me to take one?"

"I put it in your pudding, like I did Vivio's." Fate told her casually, getting a bewildered expression. "I knew you wouldn't take it without a fuss so I took care of it for you." She turned and placed a finger onto Nanoha's mouth before her friend could speak. "Don't argue with me when it comes to your health. I know about you Hayate forcing you to take days off."

Nanoha pulled away and averted her eyes, starting on the dishes. "She was over reacting. I had a small fainting spell while teaching and Hayate-chan and Shamal ganged up on me."

"You push yourself too hard," Fate countered the argument. "You know you do, and you never give yourself ample time to rest. Teaching magic takes a lot out of a person, and going on missions as well without any breaks is not good for anyone's body, let alone yours."

"My body isn't weak." The words were stated a little firmly.

"I don't care." Fate told her back, voice soft and caring. "If you keep going at this rate, what would happen to Vivio if you got hurt?" The words made Nanoha slow down her washing to almost a standstill. "What are your plans tomorrow?" She went on after being handed a plate to dry.

Nanoha shook her head lightly. "I just need to take Raising Heart to the base for her checkup. After that I was hoping to spend some time with you?"

"Let me take her; you need to sleep in for once. Is that okay, Raising Heart?"

A slightly robotic female voice picked up before Nanoha had a chance to reply. "All right. That would please me."

Fate smiled and placed the now clean plate back in the counter. "You can't say no to that." Instead of a counter argument she was simply handed a new plate while Nanoha pouted slightly, eyes looking into the soapy water in front of her.

~**~

The glow of the nightstand lamps illuminated the master bedroom of the house lightly, having been set to dim so both girls could see their floating monitors better. Each sitting on the bed next to the other, their red and blue eyes focused on the task in front of them. Fate's fingers were typing away lightly, each press of the floating keyboard almost not registering from her fluttering fingertips. A document was on her screen, her official report on being held on extended leave due to a medical crisis. Of course the report was mainly the fault of Shamal, but Fate did her best to write it without lying. She had, in fact, possibly infected herself with the small bug going around there, but knew that she would be just fine thanks to the medicine she had taken. Beside her, Nanoha sat with a furrowed brow, reviewing the recent battle plans and strategies she had been working on to teach her current set of thirty students. Several smaller monitors were floating around her main one, each holding a face of a mage so she could quickly access their profile if need be. The minutes ticked by in silence for them, taking comfort in bed by shifting every now and then to leaning against pillows for added support. When Fate finally closed her monitor down, she yawned lightly and looked over at Nanoha. Her friend noticed and saved her work, closing the monitor and keyboard with a wave of her hand.

"Now what?" The shorter girl asked quietly, even though she knew that the sounds of her room couldn't wake Vivio up from down the hallway. Her blue eyes took in Fate while waiting for the reply. The blonde's standard nighttime attire was on, the black cami holding onto Fate's skin lightly. A strap fell over the girl's shoulder, making the fabric dip just enough to draw Nanoha's eyes to the smooth skin. Black lace designed with roses trailed over half of Fate's breasts before turning to a sheer fabric that did little to hide the milky white skin or the faint areas of pink just below. Upon noticing the loving eyes on her, Fate turned a slight shade of red and slowly brought a hand up to cover herself. "Hey, don't hide." Nanoha's voice came out soothingly, suddenly changing the mood as she reached forward gently to take Fate's hand and bring it down. "You're too lovely to hide…"

"Nanoha…" Fate shook her head and pulled back lightly, making Nanoha look both scared and hurt.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have…"

"No, it's okay…" Fate looked to the side a moment before turning back to Nanoha. "But thank you for the compliment." She got a small smile back and the awkwardness dissipated around them. Nanoha moved her hands out in front of herself and stretched them out, popping a few of her knuckles before bending backwards. When a grunt came from her mouth with no cracking from her back, Fate gave her an amused look. "Shall I?" A small nod came and the two shifted so they were facing the same way with the blonde behind Nanoha. Wrapping her arms around the slender waist, Fate braced herself and waited for the familiar nod before pulling back and up. A low popping noise came and Nanoha tensed up a second before letting out a sigh of relief. "There, better?"

Nanoha leaned forward a bit and then back into Fate's arms. "Oh, yes. Thank you, I've been needing that for a while now."

Fate placed her hands on Nanoha's shoulders and frowned lightly at the feeling. "You're tense… Nanoha your muscles are all taut, have you been stretching properly?"

"Of course I have been. I just haven't had someone I could trade back rubs with when I get sore." Nanoha looked over her shoulder and grinned at her friend. "Hey, know what I would just love right now?"

The blonde gave Nanoha a light nod. "Okay, lay down." She watched as slender fingers undid the buttons on the pink nightshirt before shamelessly exposing her breasts while folding the shirt to lay on the bedside. Ruby eyes glanced downwards lightly, taking in the slightly tanned skin on Nanoha. The other girl didn't miss this, and gave a small pose, moving her hands up and behind herself so her breasts would stick out more. "Nanoha?"

"You always did like looking at me for some reason?"

Fate blushed and had to avert her eyes. "…You're beautiful, you know." She chose not to focus on the fact that she looked at her because she simply loved her. "Turn around?"

"Okay," Nanoha shifted so she was on her stomach and scooped both arms under a pillow so she could rest her cheek on it comfortably. "Thank you for this."

"Don't worry about it." Fate rubbed her hands together quickly, pressing them together until she felt the friction start to heat her hands. Once ready, she placed them both on Nanoha's shoulder blades and pushed down. A pleased moan came at once and she couldn't help but feel a little proud from it. Although not skilled in back rubbing, she did know Nanoha's body well. The usual sore spots were paid careful attention to as she massaged her friend's stiff back. Her thumbs pressed and kneaded the skin as her hands trailed over the almost purring girl laying down. '_I wonder if she wants me to do her lower back still…_' Fate's face still held the tint from before and could tell it wasn't going to go away when she reached the small of Nanoha's back. Her friend shifted noticeably an got comfortable again, letting out another moan as the area was paid attention to. The top of Nanoha's panties were pushed up by Fate's little fingers, working her hands under the fabric and caressing Nanoha's sides. "Like this?"

"You know what I like," Nanoha replied in a blissful half asleep mutter. "Fate-chan is the best…"

Smiling, the blonde pressed just a little harder. Running her hands along Nanoha's sides, she pushed them up her body and looped to the shoulders only to come back down again. The fabric was shifted again and she put her weight in the rub there, deeply kneading the soft skin and getting a mix of sounds coming from her friend. After paying a little more attention to Nanoha's favorite area, she moved down to her thighs, embracing each leg in turn. Each curve was catered to, down to her feet, which were embraced in Fate's hands. Memories came back to girl rubbing, eyes glazing slightly as she watched Nanoha's back rise and fall lightly. Her lips were turned up in a small smile, breath slow and even but not fully asleep yet. '_I used to rub her back several times a week,_' the words came into her mind easily, recalling the pleasant times when they lived together. '_I remember her selfishly asking for it after we made love, that same smile on her face… How she would tell me that she loved me so many times while I massaged her._' She took in Nanoha's figure. Tones muscles, smooth skin, and faint traces of scars that almost went unnoticed unless someone knew where to look. '_I remember…_' Moving on her instincts, Fate bent over and kissed Nanoha's back softly. '_I… miss it so much…_' Soft intakes of air were coming from Nanoha now, eyes closed contently. Moving carefully, Fate brought the covers up over both of them and laid behind Nanoha. One arm went over the girl and she closed her eyes, burying her face in Nanoha's hair. '_This once… I can be selfish._' She inhaled through her nose, almost tasting the intoxicating scent of her past lover. Moving closer, she cuddled Nanoha and felt the body shift to accept the new warmth behind it. '_Sweet dreams, Nanoha._'


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks to Angel and Dezo again for all their help.

* * *

My red eyes slowly open as the light they had been trying to avoid finally covered them completely. I looked out over the room and realized that I had one arm hanging off my side of the bed. After lifting my head from the pillow and trying not to fall into the floor, I noticed that Nanoha's sleeping habits had once again taken almost the entire bed. It was at times like this that I missed our Royal King size bed_._ I lazily moved my legs over so I could put my feet on the floor and stood up in a stretch. Turning to look back, I saw Nanoha sprawled out, lying almost sideways on the mattress. It was amazing how she can lay so still after making love, but is such an annoyance when she just sleeps...

**Amber Dreams II**

**By: Satashi**

Deciding to not risk the chance of waking her up, Fate left the girl where she was and started looking through the closet to find some clothes. Happily, she pulled on a shoulderless short-sleeved shirt and a pair of denim jeans. Socks were found, and after rooting around a little more, a pair of black panties with cherries all over them were reluctantly taken. '_Nanoha still buys me things to wear even if I'm not here..._' A small smile tugged at her lips and a few moments later a bra was found that she could unsnap the shoulder straps to. Once dressed properly, she made her way to the bathroom connected to the master bedroom and started combing her hair, finishing it with a fluffy silk white ribbon that matched her shirt.

Silently walking through the room, she moved to the podium by the bed and greeted both devices with a good morning. Soft replies came back and she picked up Raising Heart from the pillow. "Ready to go?" she asked her politely. The device flashed and the word 'Yes' scrolled across its smooth glass-like surface. "Bardiche," She whispered to the gem still lying on the pillow. "Take good care of Nanoha for me please?"

"Yes sir."

Fate smiled and nodded to her device before leaving the room. One outside, she noticed sounds coming from the living room and after a short walk, smiled at Vivio curled up in a blanket watching the early morning TV. "Good morning," she greeted pleasantly, getting a reply in kind. "Do you want some breakfast?"

"I already nibbled on some leftovers." Vivio revealed while watching her mother walk through the kitchen. "There are some frozen breakfast things in the freezer, I think."

Fate instead poured herself a large cup of orange juice and proceeded to drink almost the entire thing in one go. "I'm just thirsty." A second turn of the cup finished the liquid and she proceeded to rinse and dry the glass before replacing it on in the cabinet. "I'm going to go to the base for a while, do you need anything from town?"

"No ma'am." Vivio looked back over to Fate when the blonde came closer and felt of her forehead. "I feel much better, thank you."

"Good." Fate kissed Vivio's head after moving her hair out of the way. "I'm off then."

"You're staying today, aren't you?" Vivio asked suddenly, looking at her with slightly worried eyes.

"Yes, I'm leaving tomorrow." Fate's words both cheered up Vivio and depressed her at the same time, leaving the child with a strange expression on her face. "Don't worry; we'll have lots of time today." Leaning over, she ruffled Vivio's hair lightly and had to force herself to start walking to the door again. "I'll be back soon."

"Have a safe trip."

The warm air outside greeted her with a light breeze, lifting her hair slightly and making her ribbon flutter behind herself as she walked. The door to her jet black sports car was opened and after sitting in it and turning it on, the top material broke down and reformed itself into a convertible. A small moment passed by before Fate sighed slightly and reached over to the passenger seat to move around a few pieces of trash and empty soda bottles so they wouldn't blow out. '_You can tell Nanoha is a single mama..._' A feeling of guilt flashed through her chest before she shook her head to clear the thoughts.

Moments later, Fate found herself driving down the small neighborhood that her friend lived in, smiling brightly and waving to the children playing on their front lawns, and even waiting patiently for the group of slightly older males to clear out their street baseball game. With a happy nod at them when she drove by, she couldn't help but let out a small giggle. '_This is such a great little neighborhood.'_

~**~

Fate contently ignored the strange glances cast at her while she walked down the large pavement parking lot of section six. Having rested her car in one of the closest parking spaces normally reserved for high ranking officials, she had a few people attempt to stop her and ask her to move, only to fall silent when Fate's pleasant questioning smile met their eyes. Finally entering a large building, she began walking off to the mechanical studies part of the complex when a secretary at the front desk stopped her. When a visitor's pass was offered, Fate simply took out her wallet from her purse and showed her the ID card within. Fast apologies were given and the blonde was free to make her way to where she had originally been heading.

Upon entering a smaller room filled with podiums and scanning equipment complete with robotic arms to modify devices, she stopped and took Raising Heart from under her shirt and unclasped the necklace. "Shari?" She asked politely, making her friend look up from her desk and grin at her. "Hey, how have you been?"

"Just fine, just fine. How about you? On leave?"

"For today, yes, I have to report back in tomorrow."

Shari put on her glasses and tapped a few things on a monitor to open a storage area for a device. "Poor Nanoha misses you a lot; you should try and come back more often so we don't have to put up with her whining. Speaking of, she was supposed to bring me Raising Heart today."

"I have her," Fate held out her hand, offering the gem.

"Oh? She needed to sign some papers to approve the additions."

"Additions?" Fate tilted her head to the side.

Shari blinked twice before looking at the small orb. "Raising Heart, did you tell Nanoha what you requested?"

Raising Heart flashed lightly as it replied. "Fate has the authority to approve of my commands."

Shari sighed and rubbed the bridge of her nose but Fate leaned closer to inspect the now hovering orb in the container. "What additions did you request that Nanoha wouldn't know about?"

"A civilian mode with flight capability."

Fate hummed lightly in thought. "Why?"

"I believe a physical change in appearance will show my desire for my master to rest." The robotic voice held a hint of desperation in it. "Please, Fate, help my master rest."

The blonde looked at the orb in shock for several long moments before giving it a fond look. "Thank you, Raising Heart. I'm sure your feelings will reach her." Turning to Shari, Fate smiled at her. "I approve the changes. Will it take a long time?"

"Are you sure you should do that? This is Nanoha's device and all..."

Fate shook her head lightly. "Raising Heart can think for herself. If she wants it, I can't tell her no. Nanoha would agree."

The scientist put a hand on her hip. "I'm not taking the blame for this if she storms in here demanding to know why I altered her device." Fate nodded at her again and she sighed out. "Okay, okay. I ran all the compatibility test last check up so all I have to do is install and activate. It shouldn't take more than three hours since RH here is in good condition and prepped for it already."

"Thank you," Fate bowed lightly at her. "I'll come back to pick her up then. I need to go see Hayate for a while."

"Okay, I'll get started then." The two friends waved at each other before splitting up.

Fate walked down the hallway, pondering exactly what her friend's device had requested for on her own. '_Even Raising Heart is concerned about Nanoha... After the JS incident her body got really weak... and now she's still on active duty, pushing herself without even allowing her linker core to recover from being drained so much..._' She shook her head and rubbed her eyes. '_That girl, always making me worry... Maybe Hayate can force her to take more time to rest._' Her friend's door came into view and a light tapping on it with her knuckles gave her permission to enter.

"I'm really busy," Hayate stated firmly, eyes on her monitor while typing quickly on the keypad. "Make it quick, please."

"Too busy for me?" Fate asked playfully, watching with amusement as Hayate jumped in her chair and looked at her with wide eyes. "Hello, Hayate."

"Fate-chan!" Hayate stood quickly and started saving all her work while bent over. Once everything was taken care of, she ran around her desk and gave her old friend a tight hug. "Hey! I thought I missed you, I was so mad you didn't come by!"

"I was going to before I left, but I decided to stay another day. I have time now, so I wanted to see if you could get some lunch? Maybe I could help you with your work too?"

"No, no, sit down silly girl, I have time!" She led Fate over to the couch in her overly large office and sat down with her. "How are you? We haven't talked in weeks!"

"I'm okay," Fate felt relieved that her friend was still able to smile like she was after all the stress of rebuilding her base and re-establishing her battalion. "How about you? I've heard you weren't sleeping enough."

Hayate grinned. "You going to listen to Nanoha about sleeping enough? I'm just fine, really busy, but fine. Have they been working you too hard? How is Tea doing?"

"She's doing great. She already has a lot of respect around the ships and has completed several complicated missions. I couldn't ask for a better partner."

"Except Nanoha-chan, hmmmm?" Hayate nudged her. "You stayed an extra day? Did you and Nanoha-chan get back together!?" The sudden uneasy smile she received made her groan out. "You got my hopes up."

"...Sorry."

"What is it with you two anyway?" Hayate asked in an exasperated voice. "You two have been together since before you even knew what dating was. When you finally announced your relationship here I felt like I was finally able to make you two happy by putting you together like that..."

"Don't worry about it, Hayate, I'm-"

"I _do_ worry about it." The short girl took both of Fate's hands in her own. "Not just for you, but for Nanoha-chan as well. She can't handle this; it's too much for her. Why in the world are you so hard headed?"

"…What do you mean?" Fate shook her head lightly. "She can't handle it? Work? I know she-"

"No!" The brown haired girl looked at Fate with an exasperated expression. "I love you to death, Honey, but you're so _dense_. Nanoha _needs_ you. She buries herself in work more and more because she just can't deal with the fact that you're not there with her anymore. She wants you to take care of her, you _know_ that!" The look on Hayate's face made Fate not try to deny the fact. She knew it more than anyone else: Nanoha worked hard, and didn't want anyone to worry about her- even if it meant lying to her best friends. When it came to Fate, however, Nanoha showed a distinct difference in behavior. Whenever she was scolded or pampered, Nanoha wouldn't complain or act like it wasn't true. Instead, she always smiled fondly, gave a look of appreciation, and accepted the words. Nanoha _needed_ to be taken care of; it was something that she had secretly craved all of her life but would never allow anyone to know.

"… I heard you forced her to take the weekends off… Is she really that bad?"

Hayate looked down a moment before slowly nodding. "She doesn't let anyone know, but it shows. I want to ask her to take some time off, a vacation of some sort, but she got so mad at me for using my position to force her to rest on the weekends… She didn't talk to me for almost four days." That revelation made Fate almost gasp. Nanoha never held grudges, least of all to her best friends. "Fate-chan, I'm worried about her. Not just her work, but her being a mother as well. She tries really hard, but she can't do it on her own… please tell me, what came between you two? I know you still love her."

"What makes you say that?" Fate's voice asked softly.

"Fate-chan, you can't even say the _word_ sex without stammering and looking at the floor while twiddling you thumbs, yet you and Nanoha-chan go at it like jack rabbits in mating season." Just as she had expected, her friend was blushing hard while attempting to stutter out some sort of reply. "For you, who is so shy and kind and gentle," Hayate held Fate's hands a little firmer, voice going soft. "Who blushes at just getting a loving look… for you to have an actively sexual relationship with your lover, even after breaking up, clearly states how you feel. I know that Nanoha hasn't given up on you yet because of this. You love her, I know you do."

Fate stayed silent for several moments, gazing down at her lap until she finally looked back up with tears forming in the corner of her eyes. "But I don't know if I do." The simple words made the room go deathly quiet for several long moments.

"…What?" Hayate blinked slowly, unsure if she just heard her friend correctly.

"You said it yourself," Fate continued softly, looking down at her lap. "Nanoha and I have been together since before we even knew what it was… She was there for me when I needed someone most; she stayed by me when I was having such a hard time in my childhood… She showed me how to live with friends and how to start accepting people…" Fate closed her eyes and held onto her pants lightly. "She was always there, always by me… always giving me what I needed." She turned to look at Hayate and re-opened her eyes, showing moistened red orbs. "Just as she needs someone to take care of her, I craved someone to need _me._ To touch me, to tell me they loved me, to be paid attention to… She gave me everything I wanted… But do I love her or do I _need_ her?"

Hayate opened her mouth but found no words coming from it. After a few seconds passed by in silence, Fate picked back up again. "I always latched onto her, and took care of her when she needed it. I know she loves me, and I thought I loved her too…, but… What is Nanoha to me? I've told her I've loved her so many times, but did I tell her because I did, or because I needed to hear it back?"

"You didn't-"

"I did," Fate interrupted her friend quietly. "I have called her countless times, just to ask her if she loved me." Fate shook her head lightly, tears starting to spill over her cheeks. "Erio and Caro too… I wanted to adopt them both, to take care of someone who knew the pain I went through as a child… But I failed them both, they didn't need me… In the end, it was I who saved by them. When they left, I just… My world broke. My two little children who I was taking care of were able to live on their own…I clung to Nanoha more, now with Vivio. She called me 'mama' and I felt loved, I felt like I belonged again. But the thoughts kept coming back. Would they leave me? Are they better without me? Could they live on their own without me like Caro and Erio are? If they didn't need me…"

"Fate-chan, you're not thinking straight-"

"I _know_!" Fate shouted at once, tears now freely rolling down her cheeks. "I tell myself all the time that I loved them both, that I wasn't just staying to feel like they needed me! But the question won't go away! Do I love Nanoha or do I have needs that she just so happens to be able to fill!?" Silence came again, broken only by Fate's heavy breathing. Slowly Hayate moved to pull her friend into an embrace and she found it more than welcomed. "I'm sorry," Fate whispered into the stiff uniform pressed against her cheek. "I just blew up on you."

"It's okay…" Hayate whispered back as they slowly pulled apart to look at each other. "I'm sorry, I had no idea…"

Fate averted her eyes again. "I have a lot of emotional issues, I know that. Nanoha knows as well, and yet she still loves me." Wiping away her tears with the back of her hand, Fate sniffed loudly. "Why can't it just be easy? Why can't I just know how I feel? Why do I question everything good in my life?" Her words started shaking again and once more she was pulled into a tight embrace. "Hayate, I'm scared… What if I just used Nanoha to make myself happy?" Her hands tightened, pulling on the uniform. "When Nanoha and I have sex, I tell myself that I love her so much, but the feelings she gives me when we…" She stopped her sentence, blushing and crying. "When I think about how she will feel if I try to talk to her about it… What would she think if I suddenly told her that every time I said I loved her, I wasn't sure if I actually meant it or not?"

"Shhhhh…" Hayate soothed her gently. "Don't think like that, Fate-chan. Nanoha can tell how you feel, it's just something that people in a relationship can do… You can tell she loves you, right?" A small nod came to answer. "I can't give you your answer, but I do know this:" She moved back enough so she could put her palms on Fate's cheeks. "Fate-chan, the girl I grew up with and whom I call my best friend… wouldn't use someone just to make herself happy. You have doubts about yourself, but everyone believes in you. You said it yourself, Nanoha loves you despite knowing you are emotionally upset sometimes. She wouldn't be so intimate unless she knew." A light shade came to her cheeks as she tried to talk about her best friend's intimacy that she normally tried to avoid. "When you two make love, I'm sure the feeling you get is because you love her, not because you crave the feeling that sex brings."

Fate swallowed and nodded, moving to wipe her tears again. "I'm… going to have to face this aren't I?"

"I'm sorry," Hayate took her friend's hands. "But I'll be here if you ever want to talk about it during this."

"Thank you," Fate nodded, truly happy to hear those words.

~**~

"Shari?" Fate's voice floated easily through the room, mixing in with the various sounds emitting from devices and computers.

"Over here," The woman called out happily. "You're just in time, I was about to take my break." The scientist allowed the blonde a few moments to find her position before picking up again. "Raising Heart is finished, she's around here somewhere."

"Somewhere?" Fate asked, almost shocked by the vague location. "What do you mean somewhere?"

"She hasn't sat still since she was finished." Shari smiled and pushed up the bridge of her glasses. "Try calling to her."

"Raising Heart?" Fate spoke up after a few moments of confusion.

"Here I am," The robotic voice made Fate turn to look behind herself. Instantly a hand went to her mouth and her red eyes widened slightly. No more than three feet directly in front of her, Raising Heart was hovering eye level with her. Bright pink wings that mimicked Nanoha's magic were fluttering peacefully off to each side of the orb.

"You can fly?" The blonde finally asked her question in an amazed statement.

Shari walked behind the device and put a hand on her hip in a proud stance. "She can fly without the wings, but I thought it would be a lot easier to know where she was if there was something that caught your eye. I know Rein gets walked into at lest once a day, so I figured wings would look perfect." She watched Fate reach out her hand, offering her palm for the device to rest on. "I added in several more security measures for her defense, so no one can just snatch her from the air, but the main upgrades are all what she requested and you signed to."

"What are they?" Fate pondered, smiling at her best friend's device, who took off her palm after only resting for a moment to be inspected. Raising Heart chose to answer, bringing up several monitors around Fate. Each screen varied widely, showing a weather forecast, a diary for daily activities, a meal planner, a cook book, a direct link to Vivio's school that offered helpful advice on studying with their child, and many more that she would have to turn around to see. "A complete civilian device?"

"Upgraded," Shari corrected with a matter-of-fact tone. "Raising Heart can do anything that Nanoha would ever need, and then some. Tell me, though, why the sudden interest in a civilian mode?"

Fate watched the small red orb fly around her, turning her head every now and then to catch up with the speedy thing. "I have a feeling that I'm going to have a long talk with Nanoha tonight…"

"I'm sorry," Raising Heart told her, stopping to hover so Fate could easily see her. "Please…"

Fate reached up slowly, once more letting the orb rest on her palm. The glowing pink wings fluttered, showing energy feathers drifting off until they vanished into the air. "Don't worry, Raising Heart, I didn't need to keep putting it off like I have been…"

"Thank you, Fate."

~**~

"I'm home!" Fate called as she walked into the front door of her friend's house, getting shushed instantly by a smaller girl walking to the door.

"Nanoha-mama is asleep." Vivio told her with an amused look. "We had magic practice this morning but she fell asleep on the couch when we got home."

"I see," Fate mused while watching Vivio's initial reaction to her mother's device. The child's eyes were wide and shook with excitement as the orb flew around her several times in greeting. "I need to talk with her a bit. After that, I can help you study if you'd like?"

"Yes, please." Vivio smiled up at her god-mother before continuing along her way.

Fate took off her shoes and walked to the living room slowly, mentally running over her speech one more time. Her friend was on the couch just as Vivio had stated, eyes closed and breathing peacefully. The blonde gently sat down on her knees in front of Nanoha and reached out to lightly move some hair from the sleeping girl's face. '_She is so peaceful when she sleeps… I hate to wake her up just to start an argument…_' Her expression turned sad as she thought about what they were going to talk about. '_Even after I finally realize what made me so nervous, I'm instantly upsetting her instead of trying to make things work out like she wanted… But I can't talk about that now; I need to ask her what everyone wants me to ask her…_' Her hand went to the girl's shoulder and pressed on it just enough to give her a small shake. "Nanoha? Wake up, Nanoha."

Nanoha slowly opened her eyes and greeted Fate with a pleased look. "Morning, Fate-chan."

"Good afternoon," Fate played back with a small laugh. As Nanoha sat up sleepily, she took the warm spot left and put an arm around the blue eyed girl's shoulders. Nanoha made a pleased sound and leaned against Fate instantly, resting her head in the crook of the blonde's neck. "Don't go back to sleep now."

"I won't" Nanoha promised, wrapping both arms around her friend and reclosing her eyes. "But you're comfortable enough to."

Fate smiled to herself and hesitantly shifted so Nanoha had to move and look at her. "Nanoha, there's something I want to talk to you about."

"Yes?" Nanoha instantly became more awake, a slight hint of excitement in her voice. "What is it, Fate-chan?" Her left hand instantly went out to embrace Fate's free one.

The red eyed girl instantly felt guilty, knowing that Nanoha was wanting to talk about their relationship. "It's… about you."

"Me?" The pleased look died at once, replaced by confusion.

A slow breath was taken and Fate tried to steady herself for the upcoming conversation. "I think… That you are pushing yourself too hard again." Before Nanoha could make an attempt to pull away, Fate held onto her a little more firm. "Please, listen to me?"

"…Fine," the girl looked away, clearly upset about being woken up for this after getting her hopes raised.

"Nanoha, sweetie, please look at me." She waited until her friend reluctantly made eye contact again. "I know you don't like talking about this, and I know you say you are fine-" Fate could tell Nanoha held back interrupting her at that moment. "But, you are pushing yourself too hard. You are very strong, but even the strongest people need to take a break every now and then… If we had a repeat of what happened before… I don't think I could handle it, let alone you."

"Fate-chan, I am more than capable of doing what I do. Hayate-chan already makes me take the weekends off; I don't need to do anything else."

"You are exhausted when you come home, and you nap after helping Vivio train. Even with the weekends off, you are pushing yourself too far little by little. At this rate, you will be at one of your tired moments and be called into action… Like before."

"I learned my lesson from-"

"No you didn't!" Each girl stopped a moment, shocked at the loud interruption. Fate recovered first and continued in a milder voice. "I'm sorry," She apologized softly. "I didn't mean to yell… But you didn't, Nanoha. You train others to not make the same mistake, but you still keep pushing yourself to the limit. This time, however, it's not just you who will be at a loss if it happened again… How would Vivio get by if you were in a wheelchair? How will Hayate feel every time she sees you? How will…" Fate paused and realized that her chest was aching at what she was about to say. "How will I feel seeing you hurt again?" She held back saying how much she needed Nanoha and felt her heart hurt more when she didn't know if it was love or her need that made her think it.

"I'm stronger now," Nanoha insisted softly. Anyone could tell she was upset at having to repeat herself on the topic, but she was also obviously trying her best to speak calmly about it.

"I know," Fate sniffed quietly. "And nobody knows that more than Raising Heart, right? Not even me." Nanoha blinked at the strange remark and was about to question it before Fate called out. "Raising Heart, come here please?"

Nanoha felt her world stop for a brief second when she saw her device fly around a corner and zoom over to her. Hovering two feet away from her, Raising Heart spoke up to join the conversation. "Master, I fear for your well being."

"Raising Heart?" Nanoha finally whispered, moving away from Fate so she could reach out with both hands. Palms upwards, she offered a landing point for her device and brought it close to her when it landed. "What…?"

"I requested a way to look after you," it spoke to her at once. "Fate signed the approval after I asked her. I am able to help you live a normal life now, Master."

"But…" Nanoha shook her head in disbelief, not able to fully comprehend what she was hearing.

Fate placed her hand on Nanoha's shoulder again. "Nanoha, I'm sorry… But she is right. You need to rest. Not permanently, but enough to let your body become normal again, to let your linker core grow and be healthy, and to make sure that when we do need you, you'll be able to help." Nanoha felt a tear run down her cheek as her device floated up from her palms and started displaying her new features. Several monitors came up, along with everything she would need to know about Vivio's studies as well as how to do things around the house. "Raising Heart chose this on her own, so she could help you adjust."

The small red orb made the displays vanish and she moved over to Nanoha again. "Please, Master," she asked in a pleading tone. "Let me carry your wings while they rest."

Nanoha sniffed and reached out again, pulling Raising Heart to her chest and hugging her. Several moments went by as the girl stayed there with her eyes closed, not saying anything. Finally, she leaned over towards Fate and got an arm placed around her shoulder once more. "I don't know what to say," she finally spoke up, voice soft. "This will change my life, as well as Vivio's…" She pressed her cheek against Fate's neck and held up Raising Heart behind the blonde's back, looking at it with moistened eyes. "I will have to think really hard about this…"

"Please," Fate whispered softly into Nanoha's ear while stroking the girl's hair. "That's all we can ask of you. Just remember that we will all be here to support the choice that you make."

"…Thank you." Nanoha closed her eyes tightly. "Both of you."

~**~

Vivio yawned sleepily for the third time in under ten minutes, her half focused eyes drooping yet again. "Vivio," her mother's voice made her blink and sit upright again. "If you're tired, you should get some rest."

"No, I'm okay." Vivio's words were slightly slurred from another yawn she was repressing. "Really, I'm fine."

Fate looked at the small watch on her wrist and smiled at it. "It's almost an hour past your bed time, young lady." The older woman started closing the books around them and stacked them neatly on the table before handing them to Vivio. "You need to rest if you have an exam tomorrow."

"But… Fate-mama is leaving in the morning…" Vivio looked at her godmother and pouted. "I will miss you."

"I will miss you too, but you don't need to push yourself so much." Bending over, she touched Vivio's nose. "Sleepy girl needs to sleep. I will miss you too, and I promise I'll tell you when I leave tomorrow." She reluctantly handed the books to Vivio and started walking with her to the smaller girl's bedroom. "I'll help you study more when I come back, okay?"

"Promise? You'll come back before school ends then?" Vivio placed her books into her backpack and turned to look up at Fate. "It's a promise, right?" She held up her pinky, a habit she got from Nanoha.

Fate slowly brought up her hand and gripped Vivio's pinkie. "I promise I will do everything I can to be back before school lets out." Vivio frowned at the word choice so Fate tried again after thinking about it for a quick moment. "I promise I will come back before the school year ends, even if it's just an overnight stay." This time she got a happy nod and they shook on it. "Sweet dreams, Vivio."

"Sweet dreams, Mama." Vivio smiled once more and went to her dresser to pick out her night clothes as Fate made her way to the door. "I'll see you tomorrow morning."

"Yes," Fate looked over her shoulder and smiled once more before leaving the room. As the woman walked to the door leading into her bedroom she let out a soft sigh. Knowing she couldn't put it off much longer, she steadied herself and opened the door slowly. Nanoha was lying on the bed with several monitors around herself, lifted by the several pillows piled behind her back. Raising Heart was resting peacefully on her stomach, perched on her bellybutton and raising steadily with each of her master's breath.

Noticing her friend, Nanoha turned to look at Fate and smiled lightly. "You wouldn't believe what neat little programs I have," she stated in an amused voice.

"Really?" Fate took the offered conversation starter and walked to the dresser to pick out a shirt to change into.

"Yes, I can do anything I want to…" Her words trailed as Fate's shirt was taken off. Blue eyes looked lovingly at the body of her ex-lover and Fate had to turn away to avoid her blush from being seen. "I'm sorry, did I embarrass you again?"

"You always embarrass me, you know that." Fate's words held a kind tone to them, not offended by the casual action that always took place when they were alone. "But what is so neat?" The black shirt was pulled down over her stomach and she walked over to the bed to crawl into it and lean against the large stack of pillows near the headboard.

"Well, besides keeping tabs on Vivio's school, I can access a meal planner that not only suggest what to cook each day for dinner, but also step by step instructions on how to make it." She pointed to a screen and it began to play, showing a video of how to correctly hold a knife while chopping vegetables.

"No more nicked fingers, I hope." Fate's words made Nanoha blush this time, and the screen turned off to avoid further embarrassment. "So, you like the upgrade?"

"…Yes." She picked up Raising Heart and smiled as the wings instantly formed, the orb fluttering so it wouldn't have to be held. "I don't really know what to say about… you know."

"Take your time, it's an important decision. We all understand that you can't just make up your mind overnight." Fate let Nanoha rest her head onto her shoulder. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No…Yes… I don't know." A soft sigh came. "I just…"

"I know."

"I know you do." Nanoha moved her hand and placed it on Fate's stomach, gripping the shirt while laying on her side now. "I wish you didn't have to go away, I really need you here right now."

"I'm sorry." Fate shifted so she could move her arm around Nanoha's shoulder to prevent it from falling asleep on her now that Nanoha's weight was on it. "I wish I could be here for you."

"It's okay, I'll get by for a while. When will you come back?" A small moment of silence answered her question so Nanoha sighed again, resting her cheek on her friend and got comfortable. "Vivio graduates next month."

"Mm." Fate nodded slightly. "I promised her I'd drop by before then, I just don't know when I can."

"Please don't miss it…" Nanoha ran her hand in a small circle on Fate's stomach. "It would mean so much to her if we were both there."

"… I promise." Fate felt her cheeks color as Nanoha shifted again, now moving to straddle her. "Nanoha?"

"I'm just getting comfortable." The girl laid her cheek just above Fate's breasts and looped both arms under the blonde's back while her body slid down to lay onto her friend's. "Though if you want to, I could welcome a distraction…?" Fate wrapped her arms around Nanoha and held on to her to prevent the girl from trying to press the notion. "Okay. If I can't show you, I'll tell you. I love you, Fate-chan."

"…I know." The reply didn't affect Nanoha like she thought it would. Instead of the hurt look she had expected, she simply got a small hum. "Are you not even going to say anything?"

"What?" Nanoha did move this time, looking up into Fate's red eyes. "About you not saying it back?" A small nod answered her and Nanoha simply lay back down and closed her eyes. "I can tell you're depressed or confused about something. The way you talk to me, how you stare off in the distance when you're thinking… I've known you for too long not to notice. You're easily upset and tend to think about things too hard and read too much into situations that you shouldn't worry about." Her hands moved so they were rubbing the blonde's back. "It used to really worry me, but I've come to understand it. Right now you're probably thinking about our relationship and not just me taking a break from work."

Fate stayed silent, her hands not moving despite being placed on her friend's back. When no words came, Nanoha started explaining some more. "When you are like this, I try to support you without making you worry. I know you need me to say I love you, most of the time we make love because I'm not really good at explaining how I feel exactly." She smiled against Fate's chest. "It sounds cheesy, but I love you more than words can say, Fate-chan. I know you love me too, I don't have to hear it."

"How can you know?" Fate finally spoke, her voice so soft that the other could barely catch it.

"The way you look at me, the way you smile when Vivio calls you mama, the way you seem so happy at the littlest thing... How you touch me when we make love, the way you hold me… I can't really explain it, I just know." She pulled Fate closer in a small hug. "I like hearing it, but just knowing is okay for now. I'll wait until you can say it again." A sudden tight hug made her give a small smile, realizing that she had hit the topic. The sniffling and the wet drops now felt on her head made her try and move to embrace Fate properly, but found that the girl wouldn't let her go.

"I'm sorry," Fate whispered softly, voice so sad it made Nanoha's chest tighten. "I don't deserve you."

"We could fight all night about that." Nanoha protested, only to be held tighter. "Ow, Fate-chan, you're going to crush me." She got a small half-laugh, half-sob and was allowed to finally move so she could embrace the crying girl. Holding Fate close, she gently finger-combed her hair and allowed her to calm down at her own pace.

"I've done nothing but cry today," Fate spoke after a few moments, forehead resting on Nanoha's shoulder. "How can you possibly put up with me?"

"The same way you put up with me, I suppose." Nanoha replied back, trying to keep her voice from sounding sad. "Hey… look at me?" Fate nodded and moved back to look up, only to be kissed on her forehead. "I trust you, Fate-chan. I told you I would wait, and I will. I love you, after all."

Fate smiled again, lips quivering as tears threatened to come once more. "Thank you."

"Here, lay down…" Nanoha eased Fate into the bed and pulled the covers over them. The lamp by the bedside was cut off and the blue eyed girl held Fate against her chest. "If you want to cry, just let it out… I'll always be here to hold you." She felt her shirt being held tighter and the body against her shake lightly. "Just let it out, it's okay…" Nanoha whispered softly into the blond hair.


	3. Chapter 3

One thing that I will always know is what recycled air tastes like. It was sharp and crisp, chilled to make it feel cleaner. It held a slight scent of wildlife to it, but we all knew it was artificial. Any visitor on a spaceship for the first time would comment on how the air was so nice, but for those of us who went on and off of it,nothing was as nice as our native planet's atmosphere. This thought was driven home as I was teleported onto my normal ship. The familiar bridge greeted me along with the captain. He smiled and told me how glad he was to have me aboard once more. After a polite conversation, I excused myself and headed off to my room to unpack from my unplanned vacation.

**  
Amber Dreams III  
By: Satashi  
**

"I'm back," Fate called out sweetly as she opened the door to her quarters. Tea looked over from her desk and smiled happily at her partner before starting to quickly save her work so they could talk. The blonde made her way across the room and began to unload her small suitcase after placing it onto her bed. Despite being a warship, the room she was given was large, almost the size of three normal ones. Although she shared it with Tea, the enforcer she was personally training, it was still clear how much she was spoiled so she would stay on that particular vessel.

"How was your stay?" Tea asked, spinning her chair around so she could look at her friend. "What happened, I heard you were in a viral outbreak zone or something?"

Fate laughed uneasily as she slid her suitcase under her bed. "No, Shamal just... tweaked the truth a little. Vivio was sick and I carried her around, that's all."

"Really?" Her voice was mixed with unsung laughter. "Vivio is still small enough to carry?"

"No," Fate sighed and sat on the bed. "My hip hurt a little while after I sat her down, but... It just feels so weird to not be able to pick her up like that."

"The joys of motherhood." Tea almost bit her tongue when Fate's eyes suddenly went downcast. "I'm sorry, are you and Nanoha having a fight or something?"

"Am I that transparent?" Fate smiled lightly at the situation. "It seems like everyone can tell I'm upset, even though I try to hide it."

"I don't know about everyone else, but I've been with you for almost two years now, half of that in this room and on missions... I guess I just have a feel for it?" Tea stood up and walked over to the bed to sit by her friend.

Fate smiled again, once more noticing that the girl had recently started wearing her hair down in imitation of hers. She knew that the gunslinger looked up to her and felt a small sense of embarrassment when she remembered that she had done the same thing when she was younger. Signum still teased her about it from time to time, and even had a picture of the blonde with her hair braided up in a ponytail that she still kept with her.

"So," Tea began, leaning forward and looking to the side at Fate. "Want to talk about it?"

Fate took the offered help and thought what she could ask that her friends haven't already told her. "Can I ask you a question instead?" She got a curt nod. "How do you see me in my relationship with Nanoha?" Tea paused a moment, rolling the question over in her mind. "Please, be honest Tea."

The redhead licked her lips. "Promise not to get upset?" This time she was nodded at, so she took a deep breath. "I think you're a little selfish."

"Selfish?" Fate repeated the word, shocked at the answer. Many words had gone through her head when she asked, but selfish hadn't been one.

"Yeah," Tea's word trailed off as she thought of how to better explain it. "You're a lot like Subaru." Fate once again looked as if she had been slapped in the face. Confusion was clear in her eyes and her mouth was open a little as she tried to process being compared to the hyper, energetic girl who never seemed to stop talking. "You see," Tea went on, once more catching Fate's full attention. "Subaru always... clings to me. She calls me every night and when we're together she is always touching me. I know she is overly affectionate, but I think she tries to make up for her not... being born the same way I was… Like she has to try that little extra bit to keep my attention. Sometimes she gets really self-conscious about it and calls me up with this puppy dog face and asks me if I still love her." She sighed out and gave an annoyed look at the door across the room before shaking her head. "Sorry, I went a little off there... but sometimes that's how I see you. I don't know if you do or not, but... yeah."

Fate stayed silent for a long moment, looking down at her lap. As Tea realized that she probably wasn't going to get a reply just yet, she went on a little more. "Despite this, I can't really stay mad at her, you know?" Fate looked over at her again, this time getting a smile. "If she didn't really love me, she wouldn't worry about it so much. I know she's selfish and needy and clingy, but... she loves me." The girl scratched her cheek lightly. "Though I wish I was more like Nanoha-san, she seems to always know just what to say--hey, I'm sorry did I say something wrong?"

The blonde wiped her eyes and shook her head, smiling. "No, no you really helped."

"Don't cry, I have no idea how to deal with that." Tea grinned with as much humor as she could manage.

"I won't." Fate sat upright and smiled at her, eyes closed. "I've cried so much the past few days I don't think I can let any more out." She waved her hand when the girl went to ask about it. "I'm okay now, really... Thank you, Tea."

"...Glad I could help, I guess." The girl smiled back but looked at the door when a knock came on it. "Come in?" To her surprise, the captain himself opened the door, making each girl stand and salute their friend.

"At ease, girls." He told them with a grim tone. "I know you just got back, Fate-san, but I need both of you to depart immediately to help a newly administrated planet. There is a group rebelling against the alliance with us, and it turns out they have been a problem on that planet for some time now. It is best we fix this now so our negotiations and visitations with the planet will go smooth in the future."

"Both of us?" Fate asked, slightly confused. "Is the group that powerful?"

"I'm afraid so, their technology was one thing that lead us to make the treaty with them. Our men are experiencing high level AMF type devices; we will need both of you there until it is settled. Are you able to depart in half an hour?"

"Yes sir," Fate saluted once more and heard her partner agree as well. The captain nodded at them and turned, leaving the girls to prepare themselves. "Well… I'm sure Nanoha will just love hearing I'm going out again so soon." Tea gave her an apologetic look before going to her desk to get her things ready as well as give her some privacy for the phone call. '_Great,_' Fate thought to herself as Bardiche connected with her house's device. '_I just know she's going to give me that concerned look…_'

~**~

Nanoha let out a long drawn out sigh as she closed the door behind herself. "Vivio, I'm home." The standard greeting spawned forth a bundle of energy that latched onto her waist in a hug. After a quick 'welcome home!' Nanoha ruffled the girl's hair. "How was your day?" The woman watched Raising Heart fly around the room a moment before coming to rest in the air nearby them.

"It was good, my friends and I stayed in the library after school to study together. We ended up being scolded for being too loud when discussing a problem." Vivio stuck out her tongue playfully and got a small laugh from her mother. "Ah, I just remembered, Fate-mama left mail for you."

"Oh?" Nanoha perked up a little and made her way to the house device before Raising Heart flew in front of her. "Oh! Raising Heart, sync with the house and play messages please." She smiled proudly at her friend who could now do many new things.

"Playing message one of one," Raising Heart flashed briefly before projecting a monitor in front of herself.

"Hello, Nanoha, Vivio," Fate greeted them in the recorded message. "I am leaving for a mission very soon, so I'll be gone by the time you get this. Teana and I are being placed on a newly administered planet to help the transition between governments. I'm told they are advanced and have AMF devices so the chances of mail while I'm there is slim. So, I want to send my wishes to both of you. Vivio, don't worry too much about your test, okay? Don't let Nanoha-mama work too hard, hear me?"

"Yes ma'am." Vivio answered, making Nanoha scratch her cheek lightly.

"And Nanoha," Fate's voice got softer. "Please think about what we talked about. I'm sorry I can't be there to help you with it." She hesitated a moment. "I'll see you in about a month. Bye-bye." She waved slightly, the emotional parting being ruined by Teana calling out that they had to leave.

"A month..." Vivio looked up at her mother. "She'll be here before my graduation, right?"

"Of course, she promised didn't she?" Nanoha answered instantly, making Vivio smile. When the daughter happily went back to her TV shows, Nanoha looked at the now frozen image. _'Fate-chan... Please make it back in time...'_

~**~

Nanoha gave a small sigh as she slowly moved her hand up to turn off the floating monitor before her. Raising Heart hovered next to her and instantly moved another monitor to replace the now closed one for her. "Thank you, Raising Heart." The words were said out of habit, her mind elsewhere at the moment. "I haven't been able to contact Fate for a week now..." Closing her eyes, she inhaled deeply and let it out slowly. "She promised she would come for Vivio's graduation... I believe her." Glancing up at the monitor again, she smiled as the video started playing once more. A chef was on the display, instructing his audience how to properly hold a knife while cutting small objects.

Nanoha watched the small segment and looked down at her garlic clove with a new interest before slicing it horizontally twice and then vertically several times. In the end, she beamed down at her work on the finely minced garlic. "Well, at least we won't have chunks in our smashed potatoes, huh, Raising Heart?"

"Please be careful not to cut yourself again, Master." The device told her instead, making Nanoha shift to hide the band-aid on her right hand. "Check your fish, please." The device continued, displaying a countdown timer that still had four minutes left on it.

"It still has a few minutes left." Nanoha replied, scooping up the things on her cutting board and placing them into a pot with the potatoes she was about to finish mashing.

"And remember, fish can overcook and dry out just as fast in four hundred degree oil as well as hot air." The chef on the screen spoke up after the device re-wound the episode and moved a monitor in front of Nanoha so she had to look. "If your oven has a history of being finicky, pull the fish early to check if it's done."

Nanoha rolled her eyes and went to the oven, picking up her thermometer and carefully checking the food's temperature. A moment passed and a beep sounded, signaling that the fish was, indeed, cooked through. "Well I'll be..." Nanoha mused as a potholder was grabbed to remove the pan. "Thank you, Raising Heart." The device fluttered around her, shifting monitors once more so the woman could check what to do next without having to try and remember on her own.

"Mama!" Vivio's voice came up from the living room. "I'm home!"

"Welcome home!" Nanoha called back happily, turning so she could meet her daughter half way. "How was your last day of third grade!?"

"It was really fun!" She gave her mother a high-five and took off her backpack that was overstuffed with the contents of her cleaned-out desk. "What smells so good?"

"Well since this is such an important day for you, I thought we'd have something nice. I'm making some oven cooked fish with lots of sides and a salad that seems like it will be rather tasty." Nanoha went back to her cooking as Vivio inspected everything, doubt in her heterochromic eyes. "Don't worry, Raising Heart is making sure I do everything right. Oh, show me your report card!"

Vivio proudly took out her small cell phone device and allowed Raising Heart to connect to it to retrieve the information onto a display. "I made the honor list again!"

Nanoha looked proudly at her daughter's straight A's. "Congratulations! They will give you a special award at your graduation, right?"

"Uhn!" The small girl looked pleased with herself. "I can't wait until next school year starts! The new building looks really nice, and they even have a science lab as well as a training ground for mage P.E. classes!"

The mother couldn't help but giggle to herself, reflecting back on her grade school and remembering how excited she got about summer breaks that she could spend with her friends and Yuuno without worrying about studying. "Being excited is okay, but make sure to make memories during your summer break as well okay? Pushing yourself too hard isn't good for you." As soon as she said the words, she reflected back on what Fate had talked with her about and fell silent for a brief moment. "Anyway, dinner will be about ten more minutes or so, why don't you go get settled in and change clothes?"

"Yes ma'am." The child smiled and retreated to her room, now carrying her backpack with one hand.

"...Have you made a decision?" Raising Heart asked after a few moments.

"Excuse me?" Nanoha blinked.

"About resting." The small orb flew around Nanoha so she could stay beside her head, shifting monitors again to help Nanoha cook while talking.

"I just don't know... I understand what you are feeling, I really do... But at the same time it's hard for me to picture myself behind a desk. I'm a fighter, not a leader. I can train people and make sure they will be okay, but when it comes to documents and papers I just... I don't know Raising Heart, this would change my whole career, you know?" A small silence passed over them as Nanoha stirred a pot. "I have a small mission I need to go on tomorrow, I'll think more once I get back from it, okay?"

"Yes, Master." The device agreed with the simple request and let the topic drop when a now casually-clad Vivio came back down the stairs.

~**~

"I'm back." Nanoha's tired voice floated around the empty heli-pad, lost in the sounds of the slowing blades above her head. Once her boots touched the roof she let Raising Heart turn back into its normal form and float around her, as well as reclaiming her standard-issue base uniform. Several people filed out behind her, some walking while others limped painfully.

"Final check, guys." She called out to them while repressing a yawn. The moon was high over their heads and the night shift of section six had already been at their posts for hours now. Listing off the names of her small unit, she checked each one and directed some to the hospital wing while the others were dismissed to their barracks.

Once the routine was completed, Nanoha trudged to the door herself. Down the stairs she went, and made a half-hearted attempt at being debriefed before she was dismissed. Making her way to the parking lot, the woman felt a small smile come to her lips when she spied Yuuno sitting on the hood of his car. Her best friend returned the look and opened the door for her. "Long mission?"

"Don't remind me." Nanoha leaned the seat back and rubbed her forehead as Yuuno walked around to enter the driver's side. "It was so annoying; the people I was commanding were so green that it really gave us a disadvantage. I am proud of them but sometimes I just wish I could..."

"Take a breather?" Yuuno asked curiously, arching an eyebrow at her.

"Not a word," Nanoha replied back, her voice mixed with both annoyance and humor. "Thank you for picking me up."

"I couldn't let you drive home after you contacted me. You looked more dead than alive, no offense."

"None taken. Still no word from Fate-chan?"

"I told you when you called me, I'd let you know the second I got in touch with her. Communications are still cut off...Don't worry, she's strong and Tea is also with her."

"I know, but still..." Nanoha sighed out and rolled onto her side to get comfortable, watching the lights of the city glide over the inside of Yuuno's car. "She promised she'd come back, and Vivio's graduation is tomorrow." She found her hand being patted and she interlaced their fingers in an attempt to draw some comfort from her childhood friend. "She'll be fine; Fate-chan is just always bad about making dates." Instead of a reply, she felt Yuuno squeeze her hand lightly. Closing her eyes, she sighed out and listened to the soft music playing on the radio before drifting off, only to be woken after what seemed like only a few seconds. Finding herself being carried up to her front porch, the girl sighed out and spoke against Yuuno's neck as she held onto him. "How bad is it when the top flight ace has to be carried to her bed by a librarian?"

"I can drop you, you know." Yuuno teased back, getting a sleepy chuckle against his skin. "Vivio seems to be asleep, should I wake her?"

"No, she's staying at Syn's place tonight. I don't like leaving her alone." Nanoha felt herself be sat on her feet inside her bedroom and wobbled a bit when her friend withdrew from her. "I can't even stand properly."

"You're tired." Yuuno watched Raising Heart flutter around her master before resting on the pillow-topped podium by the bed. The word _Recharging_ scrolled over the orb's surface steadily in a smooth rotation. "Do you need anything before I head out?"

"Just stay here, it's late." Nanoha opened her closet door and hid behind it while changing into her pajamas. "I need a ride back to the base anyway since my car is there."

"I'm not taking you to morning training." Yuuno told her flatly. "You're sleeping in."

Nanoha moved from the closet and walked over to him, now sporting a button up that went to her knees. "Yuuno, please, I'm too tired to argue about this right now…"

"Then you're too tired to teach tomorrow. I'll take you to the afternoon one, that's all I'm budging."

"…Fine." Nanoha rubbed her eyes and felt Yuuno gently guide her to her bed. "…Hey, Yuuno?" After being tucked in, she smiled up at him lightly. "Thank you for always supporting me."

"Hey, what are friends for, right?" He tapped her nose and got a small giggle. "Rest; I'll see you in the morning."

"Sweet dreams." Nanoha snuggled down deeper in her bed and felt sleep wash over her before Yuuno could even close the door behind him as he left the room.

~**~

Yuuno yawned sleepily when he finally awoke, looking up at the familiar guest room of Nanoha's house blankly for a few moment before remembering that he took his friend home last night. Sitting up, he rubbed his eyes and repressed a second yawn from coming. Light was already spilling into the room and he heard no sounds from the house. '_Odd, it's already this late?_' The man left the room and padded down the soft carpet to Nanoha's room, where he knocked softly. "Nanoha?"

No reply came to him, and he gently opened the door to look in. His friend was still in the bed, cheek resting against her pillow and one hand hanging off the side. The covers were sprawled out half on her body and soft, steady breathing was heard in the morning's silence. Slowly, Yuuno closed the door back and smiled to himself before returning to his room. A monitor was brought up and after a few short moments, Vita's face appeared before him. "Good morning, Vita," he greeted casually.

"Yo, what's up?" An explosion rang out behind her and the girl turned her head to the side to shout out. "Oi! Stop messing around and block the attacks!"

Repressing a chuckle, Yuuno got to the point. "Nanoha is still asleep. If she wakes up in time, I'll bring her to the afternoon session. If not, could you possibly cover for her again?"

"Of course." Vita tapped her device on her shoulder. "Make sure that idiot gets some good rest for once, okay? I don't want to have to yell at her again."

"You know as well as I do, she doesn't take no for an answer. If not for her accidently sleeping in, I just know she would have woken me up for this morning's class." The two shared a knowing look before nodding at each other. "Till then."

"Ja." Vita's image vanished, leaving Yuuno to make his way to the study. The room was large and homey, complete with several shelves of old tomes that he himself had given or recommended for Vivio's studies. Picking up one, Yuuno moved to a large chair and sank back into it, crossing he legs on a footstool and opening it up to read.

The male enjoyed his break from the world for a good hour before he heard his name being called out in a slightly annoyed tone. "Yuuno-kuuuun!" Nanoha came into the study, still in her pajamas, and put both hands on her hips. "You let me oversleep on purpose!"

"I have no idea what you mean," he cooed out while still reading. "It would be rude to wake a lady from her beauty sleep." A growl answered him, followed by a light bop on his head. "Did you sleep okay?"

"Yes," Nanoha humphed at him and turned to walk away. "I'll be ready in a few minutes; I don't want you to be any later for work than you have to be. I feel bad enough making you taxi me around."

"Friends do that," Yuuno reminded her simply. "Remember when I broke my leg? You and Fate were both there for me."

"So was Hayate-chan, but I think she was just using it as an excuse." Nanoha's words made the boy blush, and that was enough for her. "Thanks anyway." As she left her friend to return to her room, she let Raising Heart fly around her several times before going to her closet. "Are you recharged?"

"Yes, my master. Yourself?"

"You bet. I haven't slept that long in a few weeks." Despite her words, she still stretched out and yawned. Her pajama top was unbuttoned and fell to the floor, revealing several bruised areas on her body, as well as white cloth wrapped around her ribcage that was still stained a dark crimson. "I will have to postpone my checkup until tomorrow since I don't have time after training this afternoon."

"Master..."

"I'm fine. Really." Nanoha shook a finger at Raising Heart. "I have a job to do, and I need to do it properly. Everyone looks to me as an example, and I want to be sure Vivio has a good mother figure so she will also work hard." If her device was going to continue the conversation, she didn't show it. Instead, the orb flew around her once more in concern.

~**~

Nanoha looked around the large auditorium curiously, eyes scanning the mass of seats filled with parents of students. Luckily for her, Vivio's graduation grade was the only one being presented tonight. Although a small party was being held afterwards for the students to celebrate, she knew the main purpose of it was for the parents to approve the schedule their children had picked out. This at least let her know she didn't have to stay for very long afterwards and could instead use the time to treat her daughter to something special for doing so well this year in school. Hearing her name being called, Nanoha smiled and walked down the aisle to a few empty seats near the front so she could sit next to Elena Virage, Vivio's best friend's mother. "Hey," Nanoha greeted happily. "What a night, huh?"

"Just think, soon we are going to be sitting at their high school graduation wondering where all the time went. I'll take this any day." Elena giggled at Nanoha's worried face. "Don't worry, I'm sure Vivio will stay with you until she's forty."

"She better," Nanoha played along. "I don't want to be an old maid with several cats."

After sharing a laugh together, Elena checked her watch. "Still half an hour to go... Is Fate-san with Vivio?"

"She's on a mission," Nanoha's words were mixed between annoyance and concern. "She promised she would be back before then but she hasn't even called me."

"Are you worried?"

"Fate-chan can handle herself, I just feel like she isn't contacting me because she knows I'll be furious if she isn't here tonight. She promised Vivio, and trust me when I say that my little girl has puppy dog eyes that will make anyone break into tears."

"Syn-chan just gets annoyed and puts her hand on her hip with a glare. It's the cutest thing you will ever see." The two mothers giggled again while Nanoha checked her watch despite having just being told the time.

"She should be here... So help me if she comes in at the last second, I'm going to give her an earful for making me worry."

"So you are worried."

Having being caught off guard, Nanoha simply sighed. "Well... I'm always a little worried about her. She's strong and won't give up, but still..."

"Love, what can you do, huh?"

"...Yeah." Heaving a small sigh, Nanoha leaned back in the chair and crossed her legs. As the chairs around them started to fill, the two mothers made small talk until the lights started to dim and the stage light up slowly. With their attention there, Nanoha felt a bit of pride swell in her chest when Vivio walked on the stage in front of the curtain and stood in front of a microphone.

"Thank you for coming to the Saint's Academy's third grade graduation." Giving a small bow, several whispers were heard about how cute she was in her little gown. Half expecting to hear her mother's voice say 'that's my daughter!' Vivio raised back up and smiled. Her mis-matched eyes scanned the room and found her mother quickly, her happy mood pausing briefly when she noticed the empty chair by Nanoha. "Without any farther delay, I present to you, the graduating class." Several people clapped and Vivio bowed once more before walking off the stage.

Nanoha sighed and rubbed her forehead. "She saw."

"I couldn't tell."

Propping her cheek up onto her palm, she braced her elbow on the armrest next to her. "Must be my maternal instincts. I'm going to scold Fate-chan _really_ good for this..." The curtain rose up, cutting off any more conversation they might have had.

Raising Heart bought up a small screen for Nanoha, who quickly moved it in front of herself. A small blinking word flashed on the screen, declaring the input to be recorded. As their names were called out, the children went one by one to the middle of the stage; got their award saying they graduated, and returned to their seat. Occasionally, a student would be given two awards, each one being announced by the Sister at the microphone.

When Vivio's name was called, Nanoha felt everything else shift from her focus and she watched with pride as her daughter walked across the stage. The first award was announced just like the others, followed by a second stating she was on the honor roll. Finally, a third award was announced of being the top of the graduating class. Not being able to help herself, Nanoha found her hands clapping louder than everyone else's and even called her daughter's name out loudly. The small girl on stage stiffened lightly but accepted her awards and hurried back to her seat, blushing darkly.

Elena nudged her friend lightly once her daughter sat down, smiling at her and making Nanoha clear her throat and pretend as if she didn't just have - what Fate called- a "mama moment."

The rest of the award ceremony lasted almost a half hour before finally wrapping up and allowing them to disperse to a large outside area. Tables were filled with drinks and snacks for the students and several teachers were walking around, discussing the child's schedule and expectations for the next school year at the building next to where they were used to going.

"Nanoha-san," a sister greeted contently as she found the woman. "Good evening, thank you for coming."

"Of course." Nanoha smiled back, placing her hands on Vivio's shoulders and pulling her to stand in front of her, much to the girl's displeasure and embarrassment of being practically hugged in front of all her friends. "I wouldn't miss it for anything."

"I'm glad," the teacher flipped through some papers she was holding and offered one to Nanoha. "Here is what Vivio-san has requested for next year. I'm a little worried she may have overloaded her schedule."

Nanoha hummed as she looked over it, seeing the word _advanced_ in front of all of her general education courses. Besides that, she spied a strike martial arts training instead of the standard P.E. class, a magic tutoring session taking half her lunch and break time allowed, and "requested library permission" instead of study hall. "I see... Vivio, this will be really hard. Are you sure you don't want to take your full lunch?"

"I eat fast, and we normally go to the library anyway." Vivio answered her politely, testing to see if she could move away but found Nanoha's one hand on her shoulder pulling her close once more.

"Well... Okay then, if this is what you really want." Nanoha handed the paper back to the Sister. "I approve."

"It will be bad if she has to change classes midway in," the teacher advised helpfully. "Are you sure she should be completely in advanced classes? Normally a student will only pick their best subject to advance in."

Nanoha nodded. "She has a private tutor as well; he's my best friend and head of the Infinite Library. Vivio is really smart so I think it will be okay."

"... Well, you know best." With a smile, the Sister took the paper and scribbled down the approval and gave Vivio a copy of her next year's schedule, which was also given digitally to Nanoha to store in her device. "Thank you, please have a nice evening."

"Thank you," Nanoha bowed as well and rubbed Vivio's shoulders once she stood up straight again. "I'm impressed, Vivio."

"Mama... this is really embarrassing." Vivio complained lightly.

"Oh, I'm sorry." Nanoha let Vivio go and bent her knees so she could talk to her on eye level. "Do you want to be with your friends a little longer, or are you ready to go?"

"Is Fate-mama at home? Is she too tired to come here tonight?" Nanoha hesitated in her reply and Vivio picked up what it meant before her mother could talk. "Oh... Okay."

"She really wanted to be here, sweetie--"

"I understand. Fate-mama is busy, right?" Putting on a small smile, Vivio continued on. "I'd like to be with my friends for a while longer, should I meet you at the car in a bit?"

"Half an hour, okay?" Nanoha smiled as best she could and watched Vivio trot away from her without getting her usual hug or high-five. '_Fate-chan... Where are you?'_

~**~

"What a day..." Nanoha breathed out as she almost wobbled down the hallway to Shamal's office. "I cannot believe I let that attack get through. I don't know what I would do without you, Raising Heart, your auto shield really helped me today."

"I care for you, my Master."

"I care for you too," Nanoha raised her hand to let Raising Heart perch on it so she could give her a soft kiss. "Thank you. Any contact from Fate-chan?"

A few seconds passed as Raising Heart scanned the communication logs she had access to. "Yes, Master."

Nanoha stopped walking at once. "Where is she!?"

"Planet Zebes, requesting backup for the final push on the enemy base in Crateria"

Nanoha turned on the spot, jogging from Shamal's office not a few paces from her and instead heading down another hallway to the main deployment section. "Why didn't you tell me!?"

"You are in no condition for battle, Master."

"That is my decision to make!" Nanoha hit her hand onto a scanner by the closed door and ignored the stinging feeling it caused. Once she was granted access, she stormed in and gaped at Hayate standing before her. Already in her Barrier Jacket, the smaller girl turned and looked at Nanoha in shock. "Hayate-chan!" Nanoha spoke before her friend could. "Why didn't you contact me?"

Hayate licked her lips before replying. "You haven't had time to recover from your last mission, and your students are not strong enough for this. I need you at base."

Nanoha shook her head. "Why are _you_ going?"

"...They encountered a powerful AMF, one that reduces their powers to a point where our basic soldiers are rendered almost helpless. Their technology prevented Fate-chan from contacting us until just recently when they took out a tower that was jamming the signals. Nanoha-chan, I have to go myself so no more people will be hurt."

"That's even more of a reason to use _me_!"

"Calm down." Hayate put her hands on Nanoha's shoulders and looked at her slate blue eyes until the girl took a steadying breath. "I know you're worried, but--"

"I'm _terrified_," Nanoha countered softly. "She asked for you didn't she? I know she did."

Hayate stayed silent a moment before answering. "Yes, she did."

"Then that means she really is in trouble, doesn't it?"

"...Yes, that is why I need to go."

"Hayate-chan, I'm coming too."

"No."

Nanoha shook her head. "I won't abandon her when she needs me."

"And I won't let my best friend get hurt because of me." Hayate rubbed Nanoha's shoulders gently. "You are tired and weak, and even went to your training field without contacting Shamal. You aren't in a position where you can fight like I need you to, otherwise I would take you in a heartbeat."

"Hayate-chan!" Nanoha reached up and took Hayate's hands. "I know what you mean, but I can handle myself just fine. I promise to you that I'm strong enough to come help."

Hayate stared at her friend for a moment before finally speaking to her once more. "You can come..." Her words made Nanoha's eyes widen thankfully. "...If you are strong enough to break these binds."

Before Nanoha could open her mouth to ask, several golden ropes wrapped around her waist, ankles, wrists, legs, and biceps. "Hayate-chan!?"

Hayate caught Nanoha as she fell and gently laid her on the floor. "I'm sorry... I'll bring her back to you, I promise." Turning, she raised her voice and spoke in a commanding tone. "Set coordinates to Zebes!"

"Hayate-chan!" Nanoha struggled on the ground, looking up with a hurt and fearful look. "_Hayate-chan!?_"

Hayate walked to the teleporting platform, avoiding Nanoha's tear filled eyes and pleading face. "Teleport when path is stable." Her name was yelled once more and she couldn't help herself from looking down at her hurt friend, who was now struggling against the bind harshly. '_You can be mad at me, if I can be sure you're safe, Nanoha-chan... Please, trust me.'_

Griffith knelt down next to Nanoha and placed a hand on her shoulder. "Here, let me…" The girl nodded softly, still in a small state of shock at what just happened. The binds on her were easily dispersed and the woman was helped to her feet slowly. "Nanoha-san, I know this isn't the right time to say this but… Hayate-san asked me to tell you to report to Shamal for your checkup…"

"I'm not a baby," Nanoha whispered just loud enough so he could hear. "I was going to go anyway." As she left the room, she could feel the tension in the air break the moment she was no longer visible to the people inside. '_I couldn't even stand up…'_ she thought as her body went on auto pilot, walking back to the medical wing she had run from earlier. '_Just like back then, I overworked myself to the point of not being able to help anyone.'_ Raising Heart flew around her, making Nanoha give her a small, gentle smile. "I know, Raising Heart, I did it to myself… Fate-chan wouldn't want me to put myself in danger for her… and I'm… not strong enough right now."

"I feel as if you understand now, my master."

Nanoha nodded sadly. "It took one of my best friends in the world to restrain me for me to understand what everyone has seen for so long… I'm powerful, and I can handle the harsh schedules and expectations of me, but if I don't limit myself, I won't be able to help when the time calls for it… I'm such an idiot." The medical bay door was opened and Nanoha walked in, eyes downcast. "Shamal… I'm here for my checkup."

Shamal looked up from her desk and inhaled deeply through her nose before standing, having known the situation beforehand. The look on her friend's face was enough to tell her that Hayate had already left without her, and she wasn't pleased with herself. "Alright… shirt, please." She watched Nanoha reluctantly unbutton her jacket and undershirt before taking it off to reveal several bruises and cuts along her body. A sigh was given and Nanoha sat on the doctor's bed without having to be asked to. "Nanoha…"

"I know, I'm sorry." Nanoha whispered to her. "I won't do this again, I promise." Her head turned to look at the doctor and she asked something that she never thought she'd hear herself say willingly. "Can we do a full physical and everything too, please?"

~**~

Nanoha looked at Vivio's sleeping figure from the doorway, smiling happily at the girl before walking across the room and slowly pulling the book out from under her. Covers were shifted and the child moved lightly to get comfortable without fully waking up. The mother placed a bookmark between the pages of the tome and sat it on her nightstand before clicking off the lamp on it. As silently as she could, Nanoha left the room and closed the door behind herself. The lights were mostly out in the house and after checking her watch, the girl realized that she was up way past her own bedtime, despite having the next two days off. Instead of going to her room, Nanoha walked to the kitchen and poured some water into her coffee maker to heat it up. The girl took a packet of instant hot chocolate and poured it into a mug before she simply leaned on the counter, staring out the kitchen window out onto the night illuminated by streetlamps.

A sigh came and Nanoha poured part of the now hot pitcher of water into her mug before stirring it and inhaling the soothing scent. Making her way over to the couch, she sat down and took a small sip of her drink, giving it an appreciative look. Half-interested eyes watched the flickering screen of late-night T.V. as the channels were changed. Another sip was taken but she almost dropped the cup when the sudden ringing of the doorbell made the girl jerk in surprise. '_Who in the world would come at this hour?_' Setting her mug down, Nanoha stood and began walking to the door before stopping. '_Wait a second…_' Her mind suddenly turned fearful and she walked to the door slowly when the ringing came again. '_If that is someone from the base… Oh my god…_' Nanoha swallowed and raised a shaking hand to unlatch the deadbolt lock. Prayers came quickly as she turned the second lock on the knob was turned, and the door opened slowly to show the Section Six uniform. Nanoha felt her heart stop beating for a brief second before she realized that she knew the person in front of her. "Fate…-chan…"

"Sorry, Bardiche is being recovered and I couldn't use the key system to unlock the door." Fate's soft words were paired with a glance downwards. A sling was over her right shoulder, holding her left hand in a cast. Her other hand was wrapped in a bandage and white strips of cloth were visible near her neck where her shirt was unbuttoned. Instead of a reply, Nanoha simply opened her arms up and stepped forward, embracing the woman in a careful hug.

"Welcome home…" The words were gently spoken into Fate's ear as she held her.

"I'm home," Fate whispered back just as lightly. "I missed you."

"Same." Pulling back, Nanoha let Fate into the house and closed the door behind herself. "How did you get here?"

"Hayate drove me after we checked out of the hospital. Tea will have to stay for a few days but she told me I should go home before Hayate contacted you and dragged me here." Fate smiled softly and limped a few steps until Nanoha rushed to her. "I'm okay, just…Okay; I'm hurt and really want a bath."

"Not until the disinfectant has had a chance to work," Nanoha scolded while helping Fate to their bedroom. "Get changed for bed, I'll bring you some hot chocolate."

"I would love that, but," Fate's words kept Nanoha from leaving. "I can't get undressed by myself." A shy look made Nanoha almost tear up before helping her to sit on the bed. "Ah… Ow…"

Nanoha began to undo Fate's buttons, and then helped hold Fate's sling as it was removed from her arm. "Does it hurt badly?"

Fate winced at the movement and had to take a small breather before allowing her jacket to come off. "Yes, but as long as I'm not… ow… moving it, it doesn't hurt…" Her eyes closed and the two took another few moments before the white undershirt came off. "My left arm is broken and my right hand is sprained. My ribs are bruised but not cracked at least, and my left leg feels like I pulled every muscle in it."

"That bad, huh?" Nanoha asked softly, adjusting Fate's hair before letting her lean back so she could get the skirt. "I'm so sorry I wasn't able to help."

"It's okay," Fate took a deep breath as she lifted her hips. "I'm glad you were here, safe. Hayate told me you were hurt from a previous mission."

"I'm fine, just a little banged up. That was a few days ago, anyway." Moving to get the girl some night clothes, she assisted Fate in covering herself with a black teddy. "There, want something hot to drink?"

"Thank you, but… I really don't think I can lift my arms right now." Fate shifted and found Nanoha helping her lean back onto a mass of pillows. "Ah... Ngh… phew. Moving hurts." Fate closed her eyes and inhaled deeply. "It feels so good to be here right now." A few moments passed in silence before Fate spoke again. "Did you record Vivio's graduation for me?"

"I did." Nanoha gave a small smile. "I was so mad at you…"

"I understand, I promised after all." Fate made another grunt of pain as she tried to get more comfortable. "You know… While I was on that planet, I realized something."

"What's that?" The blue eyed girl sat next to Fate and carefully draped an arm over her shoulders, being mindful not to put pressure on them.

Fate leaned her head back onto Nanoha's arm and looked u pat the ceiling. "I've never really worried if I would make it back or not… I've always told myself that I had people waiting on me, so I had no choice but to return. During this mission, I thought something different… I thought that even if I did come back, I would still have missed something really important to Vivio… something that she really wanted me to be there for."

"She understands--"

Fate shook her head carefully. "No, it's not that. I know she understands, but I also know it upsets her… and it upsets me. She made me promise to be there because she wanted me to be proud of her… She wanted me to be there as her mama… And what I realized was…" Turning to look at Nanoha, she felt a tear come to her eye. "I wanted to be there as well. I wanted to be recording her walk and cheer at her when she got her awards. I wanted to hug and kiss her and embarrass her in front of all of her friends. I wanted to be a mother."

Nanoha looked at her while carefully wiping away the tear. "I don't understand, she considers you a mother anyway?"

"No, Nanoha, I…" Shifting with a small yelp, she leaned against her friend. "I remembered what it meant to be a mother. It isn't just making sure that you and Vivio are all right, that you two are happy… I realized that I really wanted to be a part of it, even if it meant complications and misunderstandings… Even if it meant hurting while being away from you two and us getting into arguments again on how to raise her." She felt herself be gently embraced and she closed her eyes again. "When I realized that I was hurting Vivio and you so much by _not_ being there, I finally accepted how much I wanted to be part of your lives… Nanoha…" Moving back just enough to look up at her, Fate smiled sincerely. "I'm not the best mother figure… I will make mistakes, will have to go on long missions sometimes, and might make you and Vivio cry at times… But I want to be there for you…I want to be her mama, and be with you once more… So… Will you take me back?"

"Of course," Nanoha replied softly, a content smile on her lips. "You didn't even have to ask." Moving down, she gave the blonde a gentle kiss. "I'm not the best mother either, that's why we have to work together, right?" She got a small nod and embraced her girlfriend as carefully as she could. "Welcome home, Fate-chan… really and truly… Welcome home."

~~**~~

~Fin

Author's notes: I'm sorry it took a while to finish his, but I hope it was worth the wait. Once again, special thanks to Dezo for looking over this for me and helping me along the way. As before this is dedicated to the NanoFate-dot-us site and everyone who helps bring us translated doujinshi of this couple.

~~**~~

Hayate looked up as a knocking came on her door. "Come in," she called out lightly, saving her work quickly so she could talk to her visitor. When the door opened, she smiled at her friend. "Ah, hey, Nanoha-chan. What's up?"

Nanoha stood in front of Hayate and took a deep breath. "I would like to take a temporary leave from active duty."

The shorter girl smiled brightly and stood up behind her desk. "Oh? What did you have in mind?"

"I would like to continue to train my students, but no longer be on call for missions… I want a desk job that would allow me mornings to train and to be able to leave at five so I can cook dinner for Vivio and Fate-chan."

Hayate walked around to stand in front of Nanoha and lightly sat on her desk, still smiling. "Were you aware that Fate-chan requested to be stationed here and for her mission leave to be reduced?"

This time Nanoha smiled at her and saluted. "Yes ma'am, we decided on it together… as a family."

Hayate saluted back. "Permission to step down granted. I'll expect you to chose a post and report back to me in a few days." The two shared a small laughed together. "I'm glad everything worked out for you, Nanoha-chan."

"Thanks to you as well," Nanoha told her happily. "Thank you for looking after me." Hayate blushed lightly at her. "Now, if you'll excuse me, my girlfriend and daughter are waiting downstairs for me."

"Have fun, Nanoha-chan." Hayate waved lightly and beamed at her friend's back as she left. '_All's well that ends well, they say.'_


End file.
